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CHAPTER 8

  Sasaki Hanako was an excellent practitioner of kendo.

  When entering her first year of high school, she immediately joined the club and rose to the ranks of captain by her second year. Nobody stood a chance. Her poise, calm attitude, reliability in terms of managing the club were all top notch. Many even considered her the idol of the kendo club at their school, as many who joined were avid fans of this cool beauty with a sword.

  Of course, she always culled the members who were just there to gawk and not truly participate in any way. Screaming fans were also a distraction, whether you were a woman or a man. Kendo was not exactly a sport that required constant cheerleaders. It was a sport like any other martial art that required discipline and strong wills, something those who had joined merely to get access to the members usually did not have. Some may say the distraction was a good way of forcing the members to practice their focus, but Hanako was quick to scold everyone who had little thought to those new to the sport who wished to learn in peace.

  Hanako’s method for culling members who were not serious about being there was to have the elder members challenge them, in order for them to keep their place. There were administrative positions, but they were far and few and Hanako was so good at keeping a tight ship, it wasn’t needed to have a large group handling things like the club schedule and finances. It was mainly her, the vice captain and one more person.

  Hina was exempt from the gruelling challenge, due to having volunteered to purely help manage the club. Some may say that was unfair and favouritism on Hanako’s part, but the moment she would show the notes, books and a variety of other paperwork and forms Hanako had her best friend keep track of, people immediately backed down. They were not ready to commit to such a large mental load, either. Hina was happy to, as it allowed her a peaceful place to be at for club activities and had the double bonus of being able to hang out with Hanako outside of classes.

  And it was because of her ability to spend her days in the kendo club unhindered was how she met and fell in love with the vice-captain, Takada Ren.

  Hanako had been shocked when she told her about her growing feelings and her wish for the vice-captain to notice her. Her friend’s eyes became as large as plates when she also asked for help. Hanako had told her it probably won’t work out, but she had insisted, because it would mean so much to have her friend be a wingwoman in this romance Hina wished to pursue.

  It was disheartening to see Hanako be so unenthusiastic, when she was normally so gung-ho about making Hina happy.

  In the end, she had sighed deeply, as if the whole thing was a bother and said she would help, but to not be surprised if it did not work out for Hina.

  Hina, not minding it because the chance of romance outweighed whatever pain she would endure later on.

  Oh, how she regretted that when she caught Ren kissing Nao in the kendo club room, not some months after Hina and Ren had started officially dating. She ran out of there, like a bat out of Hell, bumping into the other club members who had been filing into the room for after school club activities. Voices calling out in concern for the club secretary reached her ears, but not the girl’s broken heart.

  Even when Hanako tried to grab her wrist, demanding what was going on, Hina wrenched herself out of her friend’s hand, just wanting to be left alone with her feelings. Outright slapped Hanako right across the face, in order to get away. The last sight of Hanako that day was of her touching a hand to her reddening cheek, a shocked and sad expression on her face.

  Now, Sasaki Hanako was normally known as a calm beauty. Serenely smiling through even the most troublesome of people and situations.

  She smiled through many people talking behind her back.

  She smiled through direct insults of people calling her weird or a monster with a wooden sword.

  She smiled through her own parents calling her a failure and wishing she’d died instead of her twin brother.

  No matter what was thrown her way, she would keep moving forward, hardly a hair out of place.

  But when she walked into the club room that day, no smile played on her lips.

  Hina had not gone back to school for a few days in order to get over the shock of Nao stealing Ren from her. It was through her own mother pushing her to go that she eventually dragged herself out of her room and went. She had to face the music sooner or later. Being as it took her mother a while to pull her out of her funk, Hina had left later than usual, so she did not meet Hanako on the way to school as was their habit. A relief, but also a shame. Hina had even avoided talking to her through text and received no texts from her friend.

  The last time they met, she’d done something unforgivable. She needed to apologize properly.

  However, it would be a while until she could.

  Entering the classroom, Hina expected people to whisper about what happened, for rumors and gossip to have spread through the entire school. She did not expect people to just go silent, staring at her with wide eyes. And the reasoning was…

  “...Where is Han-chan?” Hina had asked, eyes scanning the room. Hanako was always one of the first to be on school grounds, so she should already be at her seat, which was connected to Hina’s. But it was empty. Another seat was empty, too.

  Ren’s desk was devoid of his presence as well.

  The morning passed like some strange fever dream, wherein everything felt off. Like when someone walked into your room and would shift everything just an inch to the left. The world kept on as it was supposed to, time moving forward as the clock tick-tick-ticked. And yet, everything felt so intrinsically wrong as well.

  She heard about it from a classmate during afternoon break.

  “Didn’t you know? Sasaki-san and Takada-san got into a massive fight and she beat him up during kendo!” one girl said.

  “Yeah, yeah,” another girl agreed, “an ambulance was called and everything.”

  “The teachers say it was just an accident because of getting too passionate during kendo practice, but a girl who saw it all says Sasaki-san looked like she could kill him.”

  “Scary, right? She broke his arm.”

  “I heard the teachers only suspended Sasaki-san, since even Takada-san says it was just an accident, but he’s just being nice, I bet.”

  “Yeah…”

  Hanako couldn’t believe it. Hearing about Hanako being so violent was crazy to her. She had always been a kind, protective type, who often stood as a barrier with a cool head, between Hina and those who sought to harm her. She always resolved things cleverly with words, often shaming others for their stupidity, like some amazing detective from a mystery manga, calling out gotcha moments on others.

  She could never imagine Hanako hurting someone so severely.

  First thing she did was send messages. Asking Hanako how she was, what she was doing, but nothing. All of her texts were sent, but not a single one was read. Had Hanako blocked her? The thought of that hurt, but Hina was not going to give up trying to contact her friend. After school, she would make the trek to get to Hanako’s home, rushing there quickly. She needed to find out what happened from Hanako’s own lips.

  Her family was out again, but on orders of Hanako’s mother, no one was allowed to visit Hanako.

  “The young miss is being punished for her unacceptable behaviour,” was what Hina was told by one of the house maids. And then the door was shut in her face.

  And yet still, she would not leave until she saw Hanako. However, going through the front door would not work. It was kind of extreme, but she found a spot where she could climb up one of the walls of the compound, closest to where Hanako’s room would be. It was something Hanako had pointed out before, filled with old, sturdy vines that she used to climb when she was a child, wishing to get out from under her mother’s thumb. She stopped using them because she became too heavy for them to support her.

  Hina used them in order to get up and over, with a bit of difficulty. She took a bit of a tumble once she got over the wall, but nothing seriously. Thankfully, nobody caught her and she was able to sneak her way to Hanako’s room.

  Being that the whole house was traditional style, she was able to just slide the door right open.

  Hanako’s expression of stunned silence was what met her.

  “H-Hina?”

  Hina, quickly, spoke up before her friend forced her to leave or someone else in the house found her and dragged her away. “I’m sorry. You fought with Ren-kun because of me and you got in trouble, right? I’m sorry, Han-chan…I’m sorry I was so selfish!”

  “What? Hina, I…I’m the one who should be sorry,” Hanako said, surprising Hina with how watery the other girl’s voice was. Looking at her now, her eyes were puffy, her cheeks red. Her lips trembled as she got up from the sitting position she had been in to slowly close the distance between them. It was so painful for Hina to see this, like a stab in the heart, how the normally stoic Hanako could look so distraught. She’d caused this.

  Hanako grasped her around the arms and then pulled her close into a tight hug, Hanako’s forehead pressed against her shoulder as she began to shake, her words trembling so much Hina worried if maybe they were in the middle of an earthquake.

  “I’m sorry. I…I should have protected you from what happened better. I’ve always been your friend, the one who you could always depend on. But then I let that happen…I wanted you to live your life, be independent and make your own decisions. You’re your own person, but…when you got hurt…how could I forgive Takada Ren? How I could I forgive myself?”

  “But Han-chan, you did nothing wro–”

  “That’s it. I did nothing. I just let you go through that. I should have kept a better eye on things. What good am I to you, if I can’t protect you?”

  Hanako broke into a sob after her last words, just holding Hina close. There was something deeper going on, something Hina was not privy to, that Hanako was dealing with. Perhaps, was something she was always dealing with since they were young. After all, Hina was Hanako’s only friend. Even when surrounded by classmates or club members being able to get along, she called no one friend, except Hina herself. Had she been lonely without Hina? Did Hanako think that if Hanako couldn’t do anything for her that she would push her away? True, their friendship had been born of her friend always stepping in, like a knight in shining armor, but it wasn’t only for that reason alone that she remained friends with Hanako.

  However, she wasn’t sure what words she could say at that moment. There were no words that seemed enough to explain how much she cherished their friendship, how much that Hina loved and cared for Hanako beyond that of a protector.

  Maybe it was also her cowardice in face of Hanako’s intense feelings of not being enough that made her say nothing as well.

  She just held her friend while she cried, unable to help herself as she cried with her, the two of them sharing two different kinds of heartache together.

  On the morning of the sixth day of their time in the capital, there was a brand new dress waiting for Soleil, courtesy of Duke Florian.

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  A lovely light blue number with a gentle sweetheart neckline and decorated with golden flowers; there were also matching accessories included with the dress. Marianne, who had previously been wary of the Duke, was now singing her praises as she helped Soleil get dressed, despite her protests.

  “You have made such a kind friend, my lady,” Marianne chirped. “And she has excellent taste. This dress really suits you well.”

  “The Duke had told me she would be there yesterday, not today. What would be the point of wearing this today?” Soleil had said as her maid styled her hair. Marianne was setting one of those golden flowers that were sent with the dress on the side of her head, after securing all of her soft pink hair into an elegant updo. Truly, Soleil couldn’t help how well everything looked on herself.

  “Clearly, your friend wants you to go and have your fun before we return home, even if she doesn’t get to see you.”

  It was still mind boggling to Soleil that she could actually count on Florian as a friend. The divide between their ranks still made her uneasy about being so close or act so familiar so quickly, despite some part of her wishing she could. There was just a comfortable familiarity in how the duke spoke to her, acted around her. If she ignored their ranks, Soleil felt like she could fall into a comfortable routine with her, if she could allow it. Practically speaking, Florian was the next most powerful person under the Emperor, so it wouldn’t be a bad thing to pursue a deeper friendship, especially when you framed it with Florian never being directly involved in the events of the novel.

  However, her own moral code coupled with the memories of her past life as Hina did not allow her to pursue a friendship for that reason alone, even though it could only benefit Soleil in the long run. She shouldn’t treat Florian as an asset, a thing that could be used.

  Remembering her old friend made her ache for her old life, at times. Though Soleil was very fortunate to be where she was, there was no one in this life like Sasaki Hanako. She prayed her best friend got to be in a new life, safe and happy, after that horrible crash they all suffered in, with many friends who loved her and cherished her as much as Hina had. With all the knowledge and skills she had before, she was sure to be living some kind of amazing protagonist life out there.

  And maybe send me some of that luck, too.

  “Was there a message that came with the dress?” Soleil inquired. Somehow she didn’t imagined Florian had done any of this without saying something; Marianne was able to tell her who sent it, so a message must have been written.

  “Oh, yes, I nearly forgot!” Marianne left her lady’s side a moment, to pull an envelope tucked into the ribbon of the box. It was handed over to Soleil.

  Soleil had no idea what she was expecting when she opened the envelope to read the card within. However, what she got made her grin goofily.

  The writing was neat, with perfect loops, crossed T’s and dotted I’s. That was something expected of Florian, being a noble most likely taught to have perfect handwriting since childhood. The message itself was short and sweet, wishing Soleil well and that she enjoyed the dress. She missed her at the gala the other night and apologized that her servant only managed to get the dress this morning. That was all well and good, but the unexpected, pleasant little surprise was the clumsy way Florian had tried to make the message look a little more flowery and cute, as if she had no idea how to speak with a younger woman (though not that much younger, they were about four years apart in age) and figured she may enjoy seeing hand drawn flowers.

  The flowers even had little happy faces; truly trying to communicate with someone else was not her forte. Soleil realized that her usual missives were most likely not like this, but she must have tried for Soleil’s case in order to seem more friendly. It was honestly so very cute, when Florian had such a sharp personal image that instilled respect (and sometimes fear in those who had made her angry, from what Soleil had witnessed firsthand).

  There was no mention of meeting that night, though.

  “I should write her back.” At the very least, she could do that. Perhaps when she was back in Lorainne and the duke had returned to her own northern lands, the distance would help Soleil come to terms with the new friendship through letters. Baby steps.

  “I’m sure her Grace would enjoy that,” Marianne agreed.

  “Yes, I need to say thank you for the dress at the very least.”

  Her own message was kept short as well, marking only the needed words, such as expressing gratitude for the gift and her apologies for missing out on seeing Florian the other night. Speaking of her plans to partake of the gala one last time before going home. She also mentioned about keeping in touch through letters as well, if Florian would like to do that. Before closing up the message, as a last minute addition, Soleil drew a little happy kitty on a corner of the card and signed off on it. Marianne was trusted with the letter and the maid went to have it delivered to the duke.

  Looking at her reflection in the mirror, Soleil couldn’t help, but to marvel at how well this dress suited her, twirling a few times to see the effect of the full skirt swirling ethereally around the young woman's legs.

  “A perfect spring dress,” Soleil mused to herself, remembering the sun dress Hanako had handed over to her once upon a time. Only now that she was living a new life did she realize that the dress had never been worn by Hanako, not even once. It had been a gift solely for her, just like this dress was. Hanako really did her best, didn’t she? Could Soleil ever hope to be as good a friend as her?

  Maybe in this new life, there would be a chance.

  A whole week of opulence seemed exhausting to Soleil. Not just the dressing up part, or keeping up socially and politically, but also the amount of money spent. Goodness, the buffet tables were always so full of food and the drinks just kept flowing – it was just excessive. Looking at it all made the young lady feel dizzy just thinking of the extravagant levels of expense. The county she hailed from would never even see a 1000th of the wealth the imperial palace possessed.

  People came up to Soleil, hoping to strike up conversation, but she avoided it all politely when possible. These were mainly men hoping for a dance, yet she didn’t feel comfortable with it, turning people down. Truthfully, being surrounded by this many people and so many voices overlapping, vying to be the loudest heard, ate away at her mental reserves. Clearly, Soleil was too introverted for the social season that the nobles of the capital loved. She was right to never want to attend these kinds of things in the past.

  And as far as she was concerned, she would never attend another one of these parties ever again. Her future husband could handle that, just like how it was arranged between her father and mother.

  Yet, she would persevere. Marianne had gone through the trouble of getting her all dolled up using the dress that Florian went out of her way to give her. She’d received many compliments on it that night. The dress truly fit like a glove, though she had to wonder how the duke even guessed at her size.

  Did she guess when she picked me up? That couldn’t be it, right? That’s only possible in anime.

  However, she had not remained in the grand ballroom for very long, just remaining long enough to be polite. As expected, the guest of honour, the Emperor, had only made his appearance at the very beginning. Soleil was glad to not have another run-in with him or the rest of his family. They were kind, but she felt odd having the narrative of being childhood friends with the Crown Prince. Darius seemed kind, as he had been described in the book, so she felt all the more awkward that she couldn’t meet his expectations.

  Soleil needed air.

  Having spent more than enough time inside, trying to make nice, she could take a breather outside in the still cool night air. It was nearly midnight, according to the large looming clocktower nearby, though the festivities would continue well into the night. Her heels clicked softly on the pathed pathway, Soleil’s stroll leisurely and quiet.

  Florian hadn’t come, most likely because her presence was not needed. It made her wonder what purpose the Duke would have served during the event the other night. It must have been important, since Florian’s reputation for not showing her face all too often in society was quite well known. It was still a mystery as to why she even attended the birthday gala this year.

  As she raised her stare skywards, Soleil found no answer from there. The Duke’s secrets were as mysterious as the moon.

  “You know, if this were an anime, the male lead would be showing up right now in some clandestine meeting,” Soleil remarked, noticing all the ingredients for a romantic scene. A garden soon to be filled with flowers, a lady strolling alone and the moon the only witness as two lovers would come to meet in secret. A beautiful cliché. Of course, in this setting, that only meant that Alperene should be meeting up with Darius, though if either had even met in the first place was also a mystery to figure out as the unfolding events were beyond her expectations.

  “Lady Soleil!” a voice called out.

  Turning to face it, Soleil was surprised to see Florian standing there, out of breath, the horse she had ridden in haste trailing now behind her at a lower gait. From what she could guess, the woman had been simply too impatient to remain on her horse and jumped off, rushing forward with her own two feet. Surprisingly, she wore a lovely tailcoat, fashioned in a way that if you looked from behind seemed like a flowing dress, but straddled the line of femininity and masculinity when viewed from the front. Her legs were still accentuated by tall boots and form fitting trousers to match. And speaking of matching, the fabric chosen was the exact same as Soleil’s dress, right down to the same gold embellishments so that the two of them could make a pair.

  “Duke Florian! What are you doing here?” Soleil asked, standing there in shock.

  “I’m sorry I’m late,” Florian breathed out, taking an extra second to recompose herself. She placed a hand to her heart and bowed in apology. “This suit took a little longer than expected to tailor, much to my chagrin. The man I hired barely put in the final stitch before I came racing back. I’m so glad I made it in time.”

  “You…we…we match,” Soleil stated, growing all the more amused by the situation. Surely Florian hadn’t really gone to the trouble of getting a second outfit tailored just to coordinate with her. But on seeing a matching golden flower pinned to her hair, Soleil could only think that to be the case.

  “I thought it might be interesting if we did,” Florian said, moving closer now.

  Soleil took steps towards her new friend, touched and oddly giddy. She didn’t know why it pleased her so much to be part of a pair, but it did.

  Wishing to close the gap so she could speak more with the Duke, the young lady hurried forward, not taking care in how she moved in the unfamiliar dress. She stepped on the hem and tripped, toppling forward at great speed. A shriek ripped from her throat and she expected to fall, pain blooming wherever she landed. However, Florian was quick and sped up to catch her before she hit the ground.

  “My dear lady, I know you are excited to see me, but there is no hurry,” Florian joked, righting Soleil who was unsteadily standing herself properly.

  One shoe had gone flying when she took her tumble and she pointed this out to the Duke, who happily volunteered to find it.

  “It won’t be a moment, my lady,” she had said, looking at any spot where the shoe might have fallen.

  Soleil, mortified at her own clumsiness, offered her help. “It’s my shoe, I should find it.”

  “I’m your friend. If you can’t rely on me to help, what use am I for, hm?”

  The word struck Soleil in a strange way and she quieted down, brows furrowed and lips pursed, while Florian continued the search for her missing shoe. It didn’t take long, as promised, spotted on a nearby bush some meters back. An impressive distance; she must have been going faster than she realized. The Duke came back with it in both hands, coming to kneel in front of the young lady, ready to help her put it on. Once again, Soleil protested.

  “I can do it myself, you know.”

  “I know that and I understand that. I just want to help however I can. After tonight, I know it will be a long time before we can see each other again…allow me this one selfish act, won’t you, Lady Soleil?”

  Again, the aid was offered in good faith. Just a simple gesture of kindness. Soleil eventually agreed and watched as Florian gently slid the shoe on her foot as the clocktower began to loudly chime midnight. Were this a fairy story, that would be where the magic ended. The dress would disappear; the carriage which spirited the princess to the ball would return to its original form. All that would be left were the memories spent in a dream-like world encapsulated in a single shoe.

  “It won’t be for forever. And I promise to write.”

  “I know.”

  “And you know, it really is such a shame…nobody else has seen you like this, right?”

  Florian had come straight to see Soleil, spurred on by the letter delivered to her. There had been almost no time to create this little surprise, where the two of them had matching outfits, where Florian could be seen escorting Soleil. And right now, the duke, a person of great power, prestige and rank, was the one here helping her, a simple lady, put on a shoe while bending the knee.

  A smile, soft as the petals of a rose, bloomed on the Duke’s lips.

  “As long as you got to see it, that is all that matters.”

  Soleil gave a giddy, nervous little laugh. “You’re much too good at this. Do you normally treat girls like this?”

  There came a solemn shake of a head. “No, not really. I just thought it’d be worth it for you.”

  Now, what could anyone say to sweet words like that? Really, if Florian had been a man, she would have fallen for such notions, this sweet thoughtfulness. But then again, had it been a man, someone like the Prince, she would have felt uncomfortable, because it might have not been so genuine and kind. Though it had been a whole lifetime away, the betrayal she endured as Hina had seeped over into this life.

  So, she was glad the Duke was a woman.

  It felt more comfortable to accept her friendship and care.

  “I don’t know what I did to make you put in the effort, but thank you.”

  Florian looked up at her quietly, the moment stretching out for a while, but did not grow into something disagreeable. After a few moments, she stood up with a soft chuckle, her mirth gentle.

  And just a little enigmatic and melancholic.

  “You’re very welcome, Lady Soleil.”

  “Soleil.”

  “....!”

  It was Soleil’s turn to laugh, reaching out now to take her new friend’s hands.

  Who knew what laid in store for them, but the young woman had chosen to be a good and true friend, after seeing how hard Florian had tried in the short time they had at the palace. The time flew by so fast and yet, it felt like they had known each other forever.

  “We’re friends now. So you can call me just Soleil.”

  Florian nodded, happy to oblige. “Then it’s just Florian for me.”

  “I can agree to that.”

  The final toll of midnight had rung, the last chime echoing for a long time. The spell was over, but their time together would just begin.

  Florian asked Soleil to dance one more time. Even though the music was far and there was hardly room amidst the flowers, no social norms calling for them to make a display, nor pestering men they might need to send away, the two of them did just that. A dance with no particular rhythm or motif, just dancing and having fun for the sake of it. A final night of revelry before separation.

  Soleil lost track of the time, even as the giant clocktower continued to chime as the night went on and it soon became well past the time she had wanted to go back to the Rose Villa. However, the two simply wished to stretch the minutes and seconds and hours, until they could dance no more and had to part ways with the promise to see one another again.

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