SU TANG (素醣)
Day 1, 5th Month of the Lunar Calendar, 6000th Year of the Yun Dynasty, Taishan Province, Tian’an Sect
Cold.
Dark.
What a soulless aura.
The Presence loomed in front of me, all glare and no face, just a pair of glinting, beady eyes, staring as if it had every right to judge. I wrapped my arms around myself, trying to move away, but the shadows clung to my ankles like greedy ghosts from the River Styx, clawing their way up with icy fingers.
A hood shielded its face from me, but I could feel its weight pressing into my skull. Whether it was real or a hallucination summoned by the poison gnawing through me didn’t matter. I was trapped either way.
I couldn’t move.
I couldn’t scream.
I couldn’t hide.
The Presence advanced, and its darkness swallowed me whole.
My bones turned to glass.
I was dimly aware that my hair clung to my face and neck, slick with sweat. My skin felt stickier than a candied hawthorn left in the sun. Sensation lazily returned to my body alongside burning pain that erupted from within. I gripped my ribs until my fingers left bruises, clawing for an anchor against the pain. But when I tore open my collar, there were no wounds. No bruises. No burns.
Just me. Sweating. Shivering. Dying.
I wanted to scream.
But instead, I burned.
The Presence lit a match and tossed it into my veins. It extinguished every thought, every memory, every ounce of self-control. It tore through my consciousness like a sandstorm, blind and merciless. I watched from some distant place as my body seized. Smoke curled from my nostrils. My eyes filled with tears that couldn’t douse a thing.
Still, I shivered. Still, I remained.
When I opened my eyes, dawn was breaking, light curling across the sky like a gentle fingertip.
Then came the voice.
Soft. Rhythmic. Almost pretty.
‘Seals reflect, seals reveal.
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The first; no truer a test than the past itself.
Seals reflect, seals reveal.
The second; great power waits upon your shelf.
Seals reflect, seals reveal.
The third; look into the mirror and know thyself.’
When Chun Li had written míngjìng on the note, I thought it was about her murderer. But it was Qi Qi who realised that Chun Li had written it for me. Chun Li hadn’t written it for her killer.
She’d written it for me.
Even in death, she still tried to help me.
And what had I done in return?
Gotten her killed.
I was broken, bleeding inside, and utterly useless.
I tried to breathe. The cold water of Shuǐjìng kissed my skin and circled around my nakedness, trying to coax me back into awareness. I bit my lip and tried to leash the thing inside me.
But I knew what it was.
The Presence.
My Seal.
The second of three.
It screamed inside me, a beast without a cage. Snarling, clawing, chewing through my meridians like a dog with a bone. How long had I been carrying this monster? How had I not noticed its teeth?
“What are you?” I whispered.
The shadows swirled, answering the call of my voice. They pulled together like water circling a drain, shaping themselves into something grotesquely familiar. It grew limbs. Grew a face. My face. Dressed in flowing robes that I didn’t own but somehow recognised.
It looked at me.
And I looked back.
I stretched out my hand. It did the same.
“What are you?” I asked again.
It smiled with my mouth.
And in my voice, it replied, melodic and cruel:
“I am all that you will ever be.”
“But—”
My voice vanished mid-word, like water sinking into dry sand. I reached for my throat, then back at the thing that wore my skin.
“Come, my dear,” it whispered, wrapping me in its black-lace fingers. “Shh. Don’t fight it. Just breathe. It’ll all be over soon. It already is.”
I didn’t struggle. I couldn’t.
The Presence held me like a lullaby, a mobile spinning above an infant’s cradle.
Swaddled in shadow, rocked in death’s cradle, I let it hold me.
Let it whisper things I wanted to believe.
Maybe…maybe it would be okay to stop.
What was there left to fight for anyway?
Here, I didn’t need to think.
Here, I didn’t have to remember.
Here, I was...cherished.
Something sharp stabbed my hand.
I flinched. “What’s that pain?”
“Shhh,” it murmured. “You’re dreaming. There is no pain. No blood.”
It brushed its cold palm across my cheek.
It was right. My hand looked clean. But still…the memory of blood trickled down my wrist. The ghost of pain throbbed like a second heartbeat.
“Why does it still hurt?” I asked.
Its hand flattened over my eyes. “Shhh, Su Tang. Rest.”
Rest. Yes. That’s what I wanted.
What did it matter if this thing was killing me? I could just…sleep. Float in dreams.
Then a face—one not mine—came into view. Older. Wiser. Sadder. A braid laced with flowers framed her expression.
“Su Tang,” she said. Her voice, familiar and trembling. “I’m sorry.”
Sorry for what?
Who was she?
Why did her voice sound so familiar?
“I’ll keep you safe.”
I opened my mouth, but no sound came.
I’ll keep you safe.
Pain surged through my hand again. Sharper. Deeper.
I yanked my arm back. “Ow! It hurts—it really hurts!”
The Presence’s voice cracked, desperate now. “Look at me! Ignore it!”
“There’s blood!” I said. “Why is there blood?”
It clutched my face, pulled me close, pressed my cheek into its chest. It rocked me back and forth, trembling.
“It’s not real. It’s not real,” it muttered, in way that was more to convince itself.
Oh right. Of course. I was dreaming.
The sting etched into my palm intensified.
Outside, somewhere, my body sat in a cold pool of water. Outside, Qi Qi was waiting and watching me. Outside, she was doing everything to keep me in reality.
The illusion faltered. The flawless skin shimmered, flickered, revealing an open, raw sore.
“You aren’t real,” I whispered.
It froze.
“You aren’t real,” I repeated, louder.
It lunged to smother me again.
“You. Aren’t. Real!” I screamed, tearing through the tendrils.
I would break this Seal.
I would claw my way out of this nightmare.
I am Su Tang.
