Lady Alexia holds up a hand to silence him. She's wearing a green traveler's cloak with a hood over her ridiculous stripper dress. Is Elven culture really okay with this? Is it only humans who are prudes?"
"That won't be necessary, Sir Knight," she drawls, utterly unbothered. "Those moss-faced, bark-skinned old relics have hindered me for the last time. Our foe will flee from a large host; ergo, the party must needs be small. These are the doughtiest fighters Men have produced in some time, and will serve for an escort. You may inform my royal sister that lumber shipments for her new fleet will resume soon."
Elberetheia is building a fleet. That's the biggest piece of intel we've come across so far. Their purpose is so far unknown. Reka assures me intercontinental travel is completely unheard of. Sea monsters lurk in the deep ocean, and none but a powerful mage would dare an ocean crossing.
Six horses and a pack mule have been provided from Duchess Alexia's stables: mounts and remounts for all of us. Semuel must share with me, since his legs are too short to handle a normal horse, and Reka doesn't like being touched by anyone but me.
"Right!" Alexia mounts up, and we follow suit. "Let's get underway, you three. Consider this a C-rank mission, possibly B if we can bring the Ents to battle. This I charge you: when we fall upon the tree herders, defend me until I may unleash the flames of Elbereth. If your valor is true, promotion to B-rank is not out of the question."
***
The next week is spent galloping east, hugging the coast of Lake Ethilion. Roads are good, and every night we sleep under a roof, either an inn or a small manor belonging to some Elven lordling or other. Our way shifts north gradually, allowing us to enter the Orc-infested forest from the other end. Lady Alexia is not the most pleasant traveling companion.
"Sing me a song of men!" she demands after a brief halt to give our horses a rest.
A mountain far in the distance on our right gives me an idea, and the words come before I can stop them. "Almost heaven, West Virginia~"
"Again! Again!" she cries like a child once I finish.
Oh, how Reka seethed as I spent a day singing for another woman, every song I could think of, one after another. Sorry, honey. In hindsight, I should've pretended not to know any songs, but years with Reka have conditioned me to instant obedience. My wife got her revenge, though.
If you discover this tale on Amazon, be aware that it has been unlawfully taken from Royal Road. Please report it.
Brutal doesn't even begin to describe it. Every time I came, Reka sucked me hard for another round, again and again and again. She made sure Alexia could hear it all. It was dominance. It was possession. It was marking her territory. Frankly, I'm not sure how I survived.
"Must you two...couple so vigorously anight?" Alexia asks us the morning after, rubbing her eyes and looking like she hadn't slept a wink.
"Must you demand my husband pleasure you with his voice?" Reka bites back viciously.
Semuel and I, being wise, pack up our things for another day of travel and try not to get caught in the coming conflagration. Reka's eyes flash with green menace, and that can mean nothing good. Alexia isn't cowed, either.
"I only wanted to lighten the day with song! So dismal this road is, and it will only grow lonelier from here. I had no idea Men had developed such culture! You sing worthy songs now, fit for feasts and frolics. No offense was meant, truly. You breed fast and are jealous of your mates, I had quite forgotten."
Our Elf party member, temporary party member, sounds genuinely contrite. My wife gives me a look that says, "play along."
"As Your Grace says." She inclines her head submissively.
Oh, I see. Reka is in manipulator mode. This reminds me of the time she got me my job back on Earth.
"We adventurers spend much time in wild country and rarely get word of goings on in the kindly south. Might you have news? How fares the kingdom?"
"As ever," Alexia says in disgust as we mount up for another day's ride. Every day, the northern woods grow larger in the distance. We can see nothing beyond.
"My royal sister sits the throne, though she has thus far refused to lie with her husband and sire an heir. So petty, what is magic compared to a dynasty? It's a great jest of Elbereth that Her Majesty was born but fifty years before me. When mother and father fell in the war, she dropped everything and rushed south to claim the throne, allowing the Demon Queen herself to get up to much mischief."
Alexia's complaints just keep pouring out. I'm about to ask something when Reka silences me with a look. Right. It's best to just let her keep talking. Sorry, honey.
"My sister reckons the realm has recovered enough to campaign again against Naur. They hold both sides of the great bay and profit much by it. But it is only because we were so weakened by the war in the north that they were able to wrench Seabrook from us in the first place! We will not have it! In this, I heartily agree with my elder sister. We must have ships, but these blasted Ents refuse to let the woods be harvested. Slippery rogues, they are, and experts at hiding themselves. It's past time they were dealt with once and for all. Aid me in this, and great treasure will be yours. Men like treasure, yes?"
"Treasure, aye, but also honor, and...connections," Reka replies.
"You'll not find a better patron than I!" Alexia assures us.
"Then I believe we can help each other. The Demon Marches have potential for much commerce. More Orcs lurk in these woods. Let me tell you the tale of how we subjugated them at Tar Guldrim."
- Kingdom of Elberetheia
- Kingdom of Tykon
- Kingdom of Naur
- Disputed Lands, frequently change hands
So if you refer back to the previous map, Duchess Alexia controls approximately the northern third of Elberetheia. The Demonic Wastes are considered a lawless no man's land.