Edelgard looked down at her hands, squeezing them together. "How...How do you want to handle this, Hubert?" She wasn't really sure how all to handle this. She had known one day she'd have to get married, but she'd managed to avoid it until now. Thankfully it was Ferdinand in Duke Aegir's position, so he wasn't necessarily involved with pushing her to get married. And neither was Hubert. But plenty of her advisers were pushing and she couldn't come up with excuses anymore. She ahd run out. Hubert could probably figure out how to make them bow to his will but she knew she couldn't put it off forever. It was probably best to just get it over with now.

  He gently kissed her forehead and looked at her, softly prying her hands apart and holding one in each of his. "We can discuss it tomorrow, my lady. For now, it's late." He paused. "Would you like to stay with me tonight or go back to Her Eminence? It is late though..." She looked down. That was a good question. His room was such a far walk from the royal family wing. She just... She didn't know what to do. She knew she had been risking her own safety coming here. And she didn't want to endanger Juliane, so she had opted to come alone.

  "It might be for the best despite what people will say." Well, he had agreed to wed her, so would rumors be a big deal anyway? She really didn't feel like it was. Plus, it wasn't like Adrestia was similar to the Kingdom where virginity was prized and valued. As long as she didn't get pregnant outside of wedlock, she, theoretically, could've had as much casual sex as she wanted. But she really didn't want to... The way people had talked about her and Dimitri had been horrible. They were siblings, not lovers. Maybe in some other universe, they might have been but...that hadn't happened here.

  Hubert ran a hand down the side of her face and rested a hand on her cheek. "Very well. Thankfully, I"m already ready." She nodded and got off his lap and he stood up. He blew out the lamps and he took her hand, leading her over to his bed. She laid down and he wrapped his arms around her after he did, her burying her face in his chest. She was glad he was always such a comfort and so responsive to her emotional needs. She wasn't sure if this would ever result in romance or not, but at least she knew she'd be cared for to the best of his ability. She burrowed into him and closed her eyes, falling into an uneasy slumber.

  ?

  Hubert sensed as Edelgard fell asleep though her could tell her slumber was very restless and uneasy. She didn't deserve any of this. He probably could've gotten the advisers to quail with fear over their stupid obsession. He had known, of course, she must wed someday for the sake of House Hresvelg. She was the only one of her line left, at least in the main Imperial family. She had cousins in other houses from Ionius' siblings, but that would create a war of succession to the point of possible civil war if it was brought up. They would all have a legitimate claim to the throne. And he might very well be forced away from her if one of those others took over...

  None of this was fair to her. She didn't deserve the pressures of ruling. She had been ninth in the line of succession but she had been forced into heir apparent after the Crest experiments. She really didn't deserve this. She should've been able to live her life with the freedom she obviously so desperately needed. She should've been able to fly her eagles during falconry season and be accompanied by Ueli and Annika during those times while he protected her and ensured nothing bad happened to her.

  But no... Things hadn't worked out that way. The Agarthans had conspired and killed off her siblings. They'd not absolutely broken her, but the court had severely traumatised her. She had at least gotten her life back at the Academy though... Her talks with Dimitri made her realise her life did have some level of value. She still placed little emphasis on her own care of her life, but seeing her brother so upset over her not having a full life... Well, that had helped her go talk to Rhea and have the Crest of Flames removed.

  He sighed and closed his eyes, holding her close. He really had no idea what all of their future would hold together. A royal wedding would take months to set up so there at least wouldn't be any rushing into that. Unless she wanted to keep it a small affair which, her being who she was, might very well end up being the case. Then again, a quick wedding would probably be best... Or at least a private ceremony then a more public affair where she could invite the likes of Claude and Dimitri to wish her well on her future endeavors. He would have to talk with her about it in the morning.

  Though he was honestly so restless he probably wouldn't sleep.

  Oh well. All nighters were nothing new to him.

  So he opted to just stay still while she slept, though she occasionally said something under her breath or shifted or clung to him. Whenever she clung, he just gave her a soft squeeze which helped calm her down. This was so wrong... He shouldn't be marrying his lady, but he would do whatever was required of him. If she ordered it, then so it would be. He would always be by her side no matter what.

  ☆

  The rays of dawn made Edelgard's eyes flutter open and she looked up, momentarily confused why she was in Hubert's arms instead of Juliane's. Then she remembered. Right. She had talked with him about it... She frowned, not sure what to do. She honestly probably should take the day off court and leave it to Juliane to handle while she and Hubert discussed what their future would hold together. She would not be mentally well enough in order to handle court after whatever they discussed this morning.

  She was Empress now but she was finding out that Empresses could get days off sometimes... Juliane was always by her side as was Augusta, so she had people by her side that would back her up. Both women played an integral role in her station now. She was glad that she had so much good backup... She hadn't been especially close to Ferdinand, but once she had explained what his father had done, he had been behind her in making sure he got the proper due process. Hubert had been the one to apprehend his own father though he had 'mysteriously' perished during the attempt to capture him.

  It had no doubt been Hubert killing him cleanly so Edelgard didn't have to try to deal with him.

  Not that she was complaining.

  She remained tucked against Hubert as she laid there, not wanting the day to start. His eyes were closed but she could tell from his breathing he was awake. She'd spent a year with him in her bed at the Academy, so she could tell that he was awake and not asleep. Eventually, though, he opened his eyes and looked at her. He ran a hand down the side of her face and bumped their foreheads together. "Good morning, my lady." His voice was soft, obviously having sensed how stressed out she was.

  A frown etched itself on her face. "Did you sleep at all?" She worried about him too. It wasn't just her that deserved care. Granted, this arrangement would be purely political and for the sake of carrying on House Hresvelg in due time... That idea made her shudder, but she held it in. She didn't want anything to do with that...but she would have to. In her advisers’ minds, the sooner she got pregnant, the better. She...truly worried about sex without having any true emotion behind it.

  Hubert shook his head. "I could see how restless you were. I kept vigil over you." She sighed, but she knew there would be no swaying him. None. Once he did something for her, he would do it. She knew that by now. HE would go to any length to see her taken care of and made sure she was safe and happy.

  Now she wondered how many times he'd stayed up simply because she'd been restless at the Academy.

  She mentally shook the thought away. Now was not the time to be worrying over that.

  She reluctantly sat up and he sat up next to her, though he offered her his arm to sit against which she took it. "I really am sorry about this, Hubert...but I don't know who else to turn to." She tucked some of her brown hair behind her ear. It...it was a lot to have to deal with. She really hadn't slept well. Nightmares had plagued her, though not the normal ones. It wasn't the screams of her siblings. Those were usually banished by someone sharing her bed with her. Which, usually, was Juliane, the Mother-Empress. But it had been Hubert during their Academy days. She was so glad he was willing to stay with her while Juliane had been busy in Enbarr with the court…

  He ran a hand down the side of her face and tilted her head up. "I can't say I was ever expecting this, my lady, but I will do anything you request of me. You know that." She did, but she hadn't expected it to extend quite this far. There were plenty of others in their age group from the Adrestian nobility, but she didn't know them. She hadn't really been close to anybody in the Black Eagles aside from Dorothea and Bernie...and it wasn't like she was about to make that request of poor, terrified Bernie. She had enough stress to deal with House Varley's issues with her mother guiding her. She couldn't go to Ferdinand because he could be insufferable at times, but he at least supported her... And to say nothing of how Caspar acted. No, he would not make for good husband material since their dispositions were so polar opposite. He had no softness nor self-control, two things she desperately needed from a partner. She knew Duke Gerth had a couple sons, but he hadn't attended the Officer's Academy. Juliane was from House Gerth, but she wasn't Edelgard's birth mother, so it wouldn't exactly be incest, though it would be close... Granted, considering one of the past Emperors had married his sister, so it wasn't exactly looked down on by the Church... It was so bizarre.

  "I know but I didn't expect you to say yes..." She squeezed her hands together. She just... She was glad he said yes. Granted, it was still little better than an arranged marriage in a lot of regards. But she knew Hubert fairly well, or, at least, she thought she did. He had still surprised her by saying yes. She really expected it. She really was glad that he had accepted, though. She knew he would treat her with kindness, dignity, and respect. She could at least depend on that for a fact.

  "Well, the fact of the matter is that you can always take a consort if you find anybody that your heart belongs to. I will always be your faithful servant no matter what. I will be loyal until death. I promise you that." He kissed her forehead again and she nodded a bit. She doubted she would ever find anybody at this point. She was so reticent to trust anybody. She trusted Dimitri but things just hadn't worked out that way. THey'd stayed strictly as siblings which she was fine with but...it had ended with her bereft of any potential romantic partners. Dorothea had been kind but she'd been a little distant... She just... There was nobody.

  "I suppose that is true." She rested her head against his shoulder, eyes shut. She started to shake faintly and he pulled her into his lap entirely, arms wrapped around her. She was glad he could respond to her needs so well. Granted, it wasn't like she was hard to read... And he knew her inside and out at this point. She could count on the fact that he knew her so well to respond to what she needed. She just didn't want any of this to happen. She didn't want to get married. She didn't want to bear children. She didn't even want to be Empress, but she had been coronated anyway. There was no other choice.

  "Would you like me to get some breakfast for us and perhaps some lavender tea for you?" It had become a part of her nightly routine with Juliane after she'd initially started court. It seemed to help her anxiety to some degree. Though she wasn't sure how well it'd help right now. But it was probably best to give it a shot anyway. She didn't want to be alone right now but she was starting to feel some hunger pangs.

  "Okay." She shifted out of his lap and sat on his bed. He went over to the hook near his bed and placed a heavy robe on her, kissing her head. Despite the heat, she wrapped it around herself, finding comfort in the weight that came from it. She really did not want to be alone right now. But maybe she should pursue the weight thing... She did appreciate being hugged tightly so maybe there was some merit to it…

  She noticed a bit of heat enter his cheeks. "Though, er, I will have to get dressed, my lady." Oh. Oh. Her own cheeks heated and she buried her face in her hands, closing her eyes. No, she couldn't stand the idea of seeing him naked right now... She knew she'd have to do it in due time, but for right now it was way too much. After a few minutes, he cleared his throat and put a hand on her head. "It's okay now." She peeked from between her fingers and saw him fully clothed in his day clothes and she nodded. He left the room quiet and she was alone. She pulled her knees to her chest, burying herself in the heavy robe. It...felt nice to have that sort of pressure on her even if she couldn't explain why.

  It took him a little while to come back, but once he did, he had a tray with what looked like a serving and a half of food with a teapot on it. He sat it on his night stand and offered her a mug of the hot tea. She sipped at it and leaned against him, keeping the robe wrapped around her. The tea at least did start to help settle her stomach a bit and she finished the mug, then handed it back to him. "I know you're stressed, so I only brought you a small bit." It was about the same amount she'd eaten after the Crest experiments when her body refused to take in too much at once. It was about the same amount she ate when stressed out...like she was now.

  "Thank you." She took the food and picked at it. Even for as little as there was, she still wasn't incredibly hungry. She would just have to try to get through it though. She needed the strength to handle the upcoming conversation. They hadn't fully discussed everything, so yeah, she definitely needed to eat.

  After they'd both finished, he poured her another mug of tea, cooler this time, while she sipped at it. She felt him let out a breath. "So how do you want to handle this, my lady? There...are a lot of things to think about: when to be wed, how to handle it, and so on. And...what our personal dynamic should be. Where do you want to start?"

  She took a sip of tea and looked at him. That was a good question. The latter...was what gave her the most anxiety if she were completely honest. "Probably the latter... The other stuff is secondary in the end." It really was. She was most worried about what would change between them. She liked the relationship they had now. It had worked for so many years. Granted, she couldn't remember most of those years, and as she got older, her childhood became fuzzier and fuzzier. She was losing the few years of concrete memories she did have which would mean that, in probably just a few more years, her entire life would simply be a massive blank.

  "Probably for the best. I...will be Emperor and your husband. But my service to you will always come first. Or do you want to change that? If you want to change it, then there will be a transition period. I can adapt as I always do, but it'll be hard to get out of a lifelong mindset should you choose to change it." She bit her lip a bit as she thought. These were all good questions, ones she didn't have an immediate answer to. She would really, really need to think this over and make a list of pros and cons. She respected Hubert and relied on him so much. Though she did frown. He wouldn't be Minister to the Imperial Household anymore; like he had said himself, he would be Emperor.

  "Can I think about it for a while?" She just... She really didn't know what to think. She was so used to him being her vassal and putting her first. She did know one thing she wanted even if nothing changed between them. "Can you...call me by my name if nothing else?" It felt strange to ask that of him. It was always 'my lad, Lady Edelgard,' and, now, 'Your Majesty.' The lady comments were only for private like now. Other than that, it was always 'Your Majesty' or 'Her Majesty.' She knew he didn't mean it, but it felt like it did leave a certain distance between them that hadn't been there before.

  He blinked at that but nodded slowly. "I'll try my best. It may take some time though... I've only ever referred to you by a title your entire life." She nodded. She could understand that. Even the fractured memories she had from before the Crest experiments had always been with a title. She couldn't blame him at all for taking time to adjust to that. Plus, it'd be weird to her too... Hearing him call her by name, but... It was something she wanted if they were going to be in a relationship even if there was no romance to it.

  "So what do you want to do about a marriage ceremony and all of that?" Another good question. "Though if you'd like, I could say what I think would be best."

  "I'll hear you out." Sometimes, she thought Hubert knew her better than she knew herself half the time. He always seemed to know just what she needed to hear or what he needed to do in order to calm her or help her feel better.

  "I think we should plan a typical Imperial wedding for several months from now. You can invite whoever you want. Plus, the nobles will want to have their say as well. But, for us...have a private ceremony done. I don't think your anxiety would hold out for several months while we waited to be wed." She pursed her lips together, unable to deny his words at all. He really was right. She was already anxious about the marriage in general. She didn't want it, but she knew she had to marry for the sake of House Hresvelg. Children were imminent. She would probably have to be pregnant within the year to make her advisers and the nobles happy.

  "You're almost definitely right about that. I...I'm already anxious as it is. Putting things off wouldn't go over well. I probably wouldn't sleep well which would effect how I performing court." Which she really couldn't afford. She'd been focused on cleaning up the court as much as possible, but the nobles were still pretty vicious. Thankfully, she had Ferdinand backing her up. He could be insufferable at times with using her as a measuring stick for nobility, but he was a genuinely good person unlike his father. And with Hubert as Minister of the Imperial Household the past few years, it had done a lot to help move the court in the direction she wanted. He took care of the...less savory business she couldn't do herself.

  The tale has been illicitly lifted; should you spot it on Amazon, report the violation.

  "Would you like to get it out of the way today or perhaps wait a few days?" She tapped her chin. He always knew just the questions to ask to make her think.

  "Might as well just get it over with today honestly... We can announce it to the court tomorrow but...what about your position?" He obviously couldn't hold both titles. He would need to give up the title of Minister of the Imperial Household. She knew he had a sister, but it wasn't like she'd been raised closely with her. She didn't even know her name, just that she existed.

  "My mother will take over the position. My sister...does not have the temperament to take on the sort of work I do. But my sister will bear heirs soon enough, so I will have to train one of them to take on the role in the future." She didn't know his mother either, so she'd just have to take his word for it. He knew best. Plus, his mother would have to be familiar with the unsavory things House Vestra did... There was no way she could've been kept out of the loop by his father. House Vestra was covert, but she doubted any member of the house didn't know what Hubert did. It was a question of whether or not they could carry out the necessary duties.

  "Okay then." She paused and swallowed hard. She wasn't looking forward to this part of the discussion but...it needed to be had. "What...should we do about heirs, Hubert? We'll have to have children. I'm...I'm really scared about that..." Her voice quieted and quivered. She was so afraid of what that would mean for her. She had always hoped she'd have sex with somebody she loved and would be kind to her during the act. She...didn't really know what to expect out of it when it was purely out of obligation.

  He took in a breath and let it out very slowly. "That...is a good question. How much do you remember of what the Empress told you when she gave you those talks?"

  Edelgard frowned. "Kind of just enough. It stressed me out pretty badly, so I don't remember much." Like so many things, it was banished to the ether of her memory fog. Had it been just a few years earlier, she might have remembered more, but she really couldn't remember much now. And she'd never looked into any books on it. She knew there was a whole section of the library that was dedicated to that... Juliane had warned her to stay away from it until she was ready for that...which she never had been. But she had to face those realities now.

  "You may want to talk to Her Eminence about it more then. I...don't think I'd have the tact to handle it." He cleared his throat, a slight flush to his cheeks. However, he did rest a hand on her cheek and ran his thumb up and down to try to comfort her. "I know the advisers and nobles will be pushing for you to get pregnant as soon as possible, but I don't want to pressure you into anything, my-- Edelgard." Hearing that form him sounded like she had ascended to another plane. "We don't have to jump into anything immediately. With me wielding the power of the Emperor... Well, those advisers have a lot to fear." He smiled darkly. Oh boy. Yeah. He would be an absolutely terrifying Emperor with House Vestra's resources at his disposal. "We can go at your pace. Still, I would suggest talking to Her Eminence."

  "That's...probably the best way to do it." She was glad he wasn't going to be pushing her into it immediately after they were married...which would technically mean that night if they were to rush things. She was in no shape, way, or form, prepared for that.

  "How about I take you back to Her Eminence's room and you can get ready for the day, then you can speak to her?" It was still early enough that Juliane would be getting ready for court for the day. Normally, she was in Juliane's room with her. It'd become her room as well shortly following the Crest experiments. She had moved in with the Empress since it was the only way to make sure she didn't go completely mad like Alina or break like Eckharat and Tobias had. She'd still be incomprehensible, but she'd slowly returned to some modicum of control.

  "Okay." She did feel her cheeks heat a bit. She would be walking through the castle in her night clothes. How embarrassing. She hadn't thought about that when she'd come there last night. She had just been so worried about talking to Hubert. She kept the robe over her and put her arms through the sleeves... Well, as best she could. She'd gained about five inches over the past few years so she wasn't 4'11" flat footed anymore, but Hubert remained a giant over her.

  "La-- Edelgard? What are you doing?" He simply titled his head, obviously confused.

  "I don't want to be seen in my night clothes by all the servants. I know people will talk, but at this point...there's no real denying anything. We'll be wed soon enough..." She was pretty sure people always gossiped about them regardless. With as close as they were and how he watched her like a hawk, the rumors would only be confirmed. Thankfully the gossip about her and Dimitri had died a long time ago after he'd rebuffed her proposal of dating... She was still happy to have him as her brother, though.

  "Very well." She got off the bed and he poked his head out of the room, handing the tray off to a servant. They headed back to Juliane's room where the former Empress looked surprised.

  "Okay, is something going on between you two? I know I told El to come talk to you but..."

  Edelgard sighed. "I asked him to marry me. We...decided to have a small, private ceremony today but plan a traditional Imperial wedding for several months down the road." She removed Hubert’s robe (which had been dragging on the floor) and handed it back to him. She felt bad for getting it dirty but things could be washed. It was just a piece of clothing... It'd just look very nasty to the servants whom she had sensed staring at them as they passed through the hallway.

  "Oh my, I didn't expect things to move so fast. But I suppose it makes sense with how anxious El can get..." Juliane folded her arms and looked at them. "All I can say is I hope you two end up happy together. At the very least, there will be kindness and respect there." Edelgard wished there would be love there. But she had no idea if there would be or not. She was in such a weird limbo place with Hubert... He was kind of like a sibling, he was her protector, he was her vassal, he was a trusted confidante and friend... Their relationship was incredibly messy and defied exact categorisation.

  "Yes, I suggested it, Your Eminence, for that very reason. I do not want to see my-- Edelgard to suffer that anxiety while waiting for a wedding. I know her well enough to foresee her anxiety would make things far worse than before they got better." Hubert put a hand over his heart and bowed. He really could be quite sweet when it came to her. He always knew just how to handle her and how to make her feel better. She knew he didn't really get how to emote or handle emotions very well, but he was able to respond to her needs very well.

  "Well, thank you for that, Hubert. El, are you going to feel up to going to court today?" Edelgard shook her head. She was a mess right now even if she wasn't showing it. Plus, she hadn't slept well the night before. She at least had Juliane and Augusta to help cover for her on days she couldn't be in court. She was just so prone to bouts of anxiety that she needed days off like this sometimes. She knew they wouldn't be there forever but...she was glad for them while she had them. "All right then. I would still at least like to be there, though."

  "Of course; I wouldn't think of excluding you from this, Mother Juliane. I just came to get ready for the day." She smiled at the woman despite herself. Juliane was so incredibly important to her. She had owed Edelgard absolutely nothing following Anselma's exile and the Crest experiments. Yet she had come in and still been there for her. She had treated her as her own daughter. There had never been any question in her mind that Edelgard was her daughter despite blood status.

  "All right then. We'll go to the priest after that." Juliane smiled and left the room with Hubert so Edelgard could get ready. She pulled on a purple dress and leggings along with her knee-high boots. She tied her hair back into an intricate braid, feeling up for something different than her usual hairstyle with the purple ribbons. She looked at herself in the mirror and let out a breath. This was the last moment more or less she'd be single and herself... Then again, Hubert wouldn't try to force any sort of change on her... She was glad he would respect her autonomy and whatever other choices she made for herself.

  She walked out of the room and Hubert offered his arm to her. She wrapped her arms around it and quietly headed for the Imperial chapel. It wasn't a place she was too familiar with honestly. Her family had been particularly irreverent toward the Church growing up. There had been no real call for her to go to church each holy day and listen to a sermon. She had had some traditional coming-of-age rites done, but that was merely a formality. And with her hatred of the Church following the Crest experiments, she had avoided the place like the plague. She really didn't want any sort of formal religious wedding, but she would have to abide by it to make it seem like she still had deep connections to the Church.

  The priest was more than surprised to see them there. "Your Eminence, Your Majesty, House Minister Vestra? What are you doing here?" She honestly didn't even know the man's name. He was a member of the Imperial staff, but she simply didn't know him. He had probably been employed by the Imperial household for decades, yet she couldn't remember his name or face.

  Juliane looked at them then spoke. "I realise this is incredibly odd, but Hubert and El were wondering if you could wed them in a private ceremony. We'll plan for a public one in a few months, but for the sake of the court, we all wanted it to happen as quickly as possible."

  The father looked shocked but nodded slowly. "This...is most unorthodox but there is a history of small weddings in the Imperial household when an Emperor or Empress wanted to keep the weddings to their consorts small." Well, that was good. Anybody trained for this role would probably have to have intimate knowledge of the couplings in the Imperial family's history... She was glad that it wasn't too uncommon.

  The priest went away for a few minutes, then came back with a large, ancient-looking book. He opened to a page that had no writing on it. "What's that?" Edelgard asked. She wasn't sure about any of this. She really didn't know Imperial proceedings on marriage. Like so many other things, it had fallen to the wayside since it hadn't been seen as important enough to teach her.

  "A book containing all of the marriages performed in the Imperial household, both for primary partners and consorts. It acts as proof that the union was overseen." That...was probably a good idea. People would wonder if certain pairings would be legitimate or not. So having an official confirmation in some sort of way was definitely good practice. The book looked decrepit, so it was probably as old as the Empire itself... She was really shocked it was still in use. "Do you wish me to say some words or do you simply wish to sign?"

  "I...would rather just get this over with." She took her magical pen out of her pocket and signed on one of the lines. She handed it to Hubert and he did the same. She was glad there was no fuss about it... It was done. There would nee to be a transfer of power to Hubert as Emperor, of course, but he was now her husband officially. Though she did look at him. "I suppose you'll take the Hresvelg name now..." Even for men marrying into the Hresvelg line, it was traditional for them to take the family name. And with him as her at least official spouse, it only made sense.

  "I never thought I'd lose the Vestra name, but I suppose I will." He didn't look angry or anything. It was just an observation. She still felt a little guilty though somehow. She knew he took pride in the Vestra name and his legacy. So to take that away from him... He was losing a lot by doing this. But he was also gaining a lot as well. An Emperor with the access to House Vestra's resources was going to be absolutely terrifying. She did not pity her advisers. They had told her to get married and she had. They would just have to live with the consequences of her actions. It would be them who would be walking on eggshells now, not her. "So what do you want to do now?"

  Edelgar pursed her lips together. "I should probably talk to Mother Juliane about... Well. And then I'll meet you back at your room later?" She didn't know. She was dithering. She simply didn't know what to do with herself. She was afraid. She didn't want to be alone though. That was all she knew.

  "Very well."

  They went back to their respective rooms. Juliane looked at Edelgard, her head tilted. "Talk to me about what?" There was no aggression or accusation in her tone, just confusion and concern.

  Edelgard rubbed the back of her neck. "Well... I don't really remember much about what you told me when...you gave me the talks on sex." It was probably best to just be blunt in that regard. No point in tiptoeing around it. She was going to have to face that reality sooner rather than later. She knew the advisers would be breathing down her neck to get pregnant since she was married now. But between Hubert and Juliane, she knew she was safe at least for a little while.

  Julaine was quiet for a few minutes before she went over to her bookcase and took a few books off the shelves and put them in Edelgard's hands. "Instead of me stressing you out again, perhaps it'd be best for you to approach it on your own terms. These books are pretty informative. I've had some of them since I was about your age. My own mother passed them onto me." She paused. "I'm not trying to shirk my duties as your mother but...you're already twenty and it's clear me talking to you about this earlier stressed you out. this will let you pick and choose what you approach when you're ready. Does this seem like an okay compromise?"

  Edelgard flushed a bit but nodded. "I suppose it is... Though do I even want to know why you have these?" She had never really investigated Juliane's bookcase; she simply didn't want to poke her nose into the woman's business. These books had been on a much higher shelf though. Higher than Edelgard had been able to reach after the Crest experiments. She had clearly been hiding them from her.

  Juliane folded her arms. "To put it bluntly, I was very skittish about any sort of sex like you are. I was worried when my marriage was arranged to your father and I wasn't sure what would come of it. My mother counseled me like I am doing for you now. She told me to approach it on my terms since I didn't want those talks. I at least had a few years before your father and I got married, so I had time to explore and understand things before it was forced on me. However, you don't really have the luxury of time like I did. You'll have to probably rush through the books, but it's still better than being forced to consummate your marriage before you're mentally and emotionally ready." That made some sense, she supposed. She was incredibly shifty and nervous about sex due to how vulnerable it made her. She would have to trust somebody with everything that she was. It...made her really uncomfortable.

  Juliane wrapped her arms around Edelgard and held her close. "And, remember, El: you don't have to jump into everything all at once. Hubert's not going to be pressuring you into anything before you're ready. Take your time. Talk with him openly. If you feel comfortable, explore yourself first before getting with him. Though with how you're attached to both him and me...that will be hard." She flushed more at the implication. She had never touched herself before in any shape, way, or form. Part of it was because of the reason she'd stated: she was basically never alone. Another part was she just had no desire to do that. But...it probably would help... Divine, how embarrassing though…

  "I'll...keep it in mind." That was all she could promise. She wasn't sure what route she'd take with Hubert, though not jumping in all the way right at first would probably be best. She would take time to read these books though. She had a fair bit of time today, so she might just dive in. Even if it would be horribly embarrassing if Hubert asked what she was reading…

  "Anyway, why don't you go back to Hubert's room with him? I need to head to court shortly." She sighed. "The headaches that are going to come with telling them what you did..." Edelgard did not envy Juliane. Anything with the advisers was always a headache but telling them she was now married...and to Hubert of all people. Yeah, that was gonna be a nightmare.

  She headed back to Hubert's room and settled on his bed where he sat next to her. He raised an eyebrow when he saw the books but he didn't ask. Still, she felt her face heat up a fair bit. "It...was Mother Juliane's suggestion that I approach it on my own terms rather than her stressing me out further by explaining to me again." She was already stressed out enough.

  "Ah, so I see." There was no judgment in his tone, simply understanding now that she'd explained. He did pause for a moment before speaking though. "...I'll probably have to move into the Imperial family's wing now which does raise a question: would you rather stay with Her Eminence or me at night?"

  Edelgard blinked, having not considered that. It was a good question as were so many of the things he had asked that day. "I'm not really sure... I mean nobody will bat an eyelash now that we're married... It might look very strange if I don't move in with you though..." She was concerned about how things would look. She had always been incredibly self-conscious of her status but it had gotten far worse after she'd been announced as heir apparent. She honestly really didn't know. But it would look best if she moved in with him... She knew a lot of people questioned why she stayed with the former Empress even now. It was none of their business, but she heard the whispers among the staff.

  "It's your choice in the end, my-- Edelgard." She could tell that was going to take some time for him. "But we will have a day or two before I get moved over entirely. I'll put the order in tomorrow so you can have peace today." She nodded. She was glad he was so conscious of her needs. She needed quiet today after the whirlwind that had been that morning. She did take out her pocketbook, though, and split the page in half. She really needed to think…

  "Don't look at what I'm doing, okay, Hubert?"

  "Very well."

  Over the next little while, she made the list of pros and cons of what she wanted their relationship to be. Should it stay the same or did she want him to act as more? Eventually, she looked at it, winding up a bit locked in. There were multiple points on each from that made her want to consider both. But, in the end...she put a hand over her heat. What did she feel like she wanted? She really wouldn't be satisfied if he kept acting like this... Their relationship had worked out for their entire lives now but...that was no longer the case.

  She looked at him, hesitating before speaking. "Hubert, I... Can you act a bit more human around me? I...don't know if this is going to work if you keep acting like only my vassal. I'm not asking you to be a different person; I'm just asking you to show me more of what you keep hidden. Show me more of your frustrations, your issues, your sorrows... I want you to treat me like an equal, not just a lord." He had asked her and that was her answer. She wasn't asking him to change his mind and be a completely different person. She just wanted him to behave more human around her was all.

  He looked at her, concerned, but he managed a small nod. "I'll do my best. I...can't make promises for things immediately but...if that's what you want, I'll try to abide by it." He rested a hand on her cheek and bumped their foreheads together. She leaned into the gesture.

  "Your best is all I ask." She knew he would rise to the challenge, but it would indeed be a challenge for him. He was so used to keeping his issues away from her so she didn't have to see it. But she wanted to see that human side to him now... Hopefully he could lower his barriers for her and they could stand more as equals rather than lord and vassal.

  He nodded and she put her pocketbook away, leaning against him. She cracked one of the books open and settled in. Today was going to be a very long day...