Once Solenne had awoken, she left back to the shop just as he had wanted. He hated the way dread filled him when Gwen said Solenne was sick. He didn't understand why his heart had been pounding when he found her laying there unconscious. Emrys wasn't supposed to care about her. He was there to observe her, to see if these rumors were true. Yet he had been absolutely terrified of losing her.

  If he were back in the archives, he was sure [name] would tell him that he was smitten. Emrys was not smitten. He wasn't even sure what that would feel like. Romance and women were not something he ever thought about. Besides, he had known her not even a fortnight. This wasn't anything other than concern for another human being. He would have felt the same way if Gwen had told him it was anyone else he was familiar with.

  Emrys had gone to the bar inside the inn after Solenne had left. He ordered a honeyed veilthorn mead and something warm to eat. Tonight they had stew and fresh bread from the bakery a street over. He ate alone at a small table in the common area. As he chewed on a rather tough piece of meat, he scribbled in his journal. Emrys hadn't written in it in a few nights. He needed to get caught up on his report.

  Primarch Aldren,

  Solenne is a talented apothecary. She is careful in how she combines elements to create something medicinal. I haven't not seen any evidence to show she is anything more than what she says she is. Someone did stop by to speak to her in hushed whispers but that could have been anything. I am not convinced she is what they say she is.

  However, I will continue to observe until directed otherwise.

  May the Light bless you,

  Emrys

  He signed it and tore the page out. Not too much earlier, a messenger had come into the inn for a nip of something. Emrys offered him a few coins to deliver the paper to Primarch Aldren. Surely this would show the Primarch that Solenne was just a woman and he could go back to the Aurifer to be with his books once more. He couldn't help but chuckle to himself remembering how he had once dreamed of doing anything other than being in the archive all the time. Field work was not his forte.

  Emrys finished eating, paid, and returned to his room. He gave himself until the candle he lit burned to almost nothing to write more. Mostly he wrote of his first adventure out into the Wilds. He recounted the plants he had found. There had been an odd noise or two but overall, he had surprisingly enjoyed his trip out there. Maybe he would go again. He could ask Solenne. Surely she wouldn't mind showing him a few other things in person.

  The candle burned slowly yet somehow too quickly. The light from it flickering out as it reached a point of no return. Emrys snuffed out what little light it had left between two fingers. He closed his journal, stood up, and got ready for yet another sleep. He prayed to the Choir for a dreamless sleep so he could rest before the morning came.

  ???????????????

  That morning he found himself back at the shop. He had managed to get there before Solenne had even opened meaning he had to wait. Emrys rocked on his heels until she opened the door. He was immediately concerned. She still looked pale. They bags below her eyes were darker than they had been before. He frowned.

  "Stop that Emrys." She chided as she let him inside.

  He did stop the frown but his brow stayed furrowed in worry. "Let me make the coffee." Emrys had watched her enough that he knew what he was doing. At least he felt as if he did.

  The two of them walked behind the counter. He went upstairs to gather things while she stayed below. Emrys made note that the window across from the stairs was open whereas she usually had it closed. She must have gotten hot in the night. He grabbed what he had been looking for and returned down to where Solenne was resting against the counter.

  "How are you feeling?" He asked as he sat the mortar and pestle next to him.

  Solenne smiled weakly at him. "I can't lie, I am still tired. I didn't eat last night so I am feeling a little...off."

  The frown returned. He knew he should have forced her to eat something, anything. She had told him to stop fretting over her. She would eat when she got home. Emrys didn't like that she had told him a white lie. There had been no reason for it. He would have understood if she had just wanted to go home.

  "I am cooking something." He announced with determination in his voice.

  "You want to cook?" She sounded surprised by that. It wasn't the kind of surprise he was used to. There was something else about her tone that he couldn't place entirely.

  Emrys nodded. "Yes. Do you have food or do I need to go to the market once I finish making the coffee?" He was hoping she had something. This odd need to care for her had him almost unwilling to leave her side for too long. At least not until he knew that she truly was better.

  Solenne leaned against the counter. She was seemingly watching him. Emrys swallowed hard. His mouth was dry. He poured his focus into getting the beans just how she liked them. His mind raced as he waited on her reply. Surely she had something, anything. Please don't make him go to the market without her.

  "I have some food here. I'll go get what I have." She gently pushed off of the counter.

  Emrys stopped grinding. "Are you sure? I have no issues going to get things. Here. You wait here and I'll just go to the-"

  "No!" She all but snapped. Both of their eyes went wide at her outburst. Emrys swore he saw tears welling up in hers. She took a breath in and let it out slow. "My apologies, Emrys. I keep my very expensive herbs and things in the cellar. I don't like anyone else going down there. Please forgive my outburst."

  He could only nod. "Of course Sol. I didn't mean to upset you. Its probably better you go anyway. I wouldn't even know where you keep things." Emrys smiled sheepishly. It was true. She had never let him in there to even know where she would keep her pantry items or meats. Hell, he rarely saw her go through the moss covered door at all.

  Despite her explanation, Emrys felt there was something more to it. He could see how tense she was as she walked to the door. As she reached for the handle he could see her fingers trembling. Her fingertips were black up to the middle of her first knuckle. Had she gotten into something after returning home? Before he had gone to the Wilds, he had seen her fingers as she handed him the list. The ashy darkness hadn't been that far up. He bit the inside of his cheek. Emrys went back to grinding the beans as she vanished into the cellar.

  He was going over a variety of scenarios in his head when she returned. Solenne was carrying a rectangular bit of brown butcher paper wrapped in twine. She also had a glass jar much like the other ones in her shop. It looked as if it had some sort of jam or something in it. Emrys had finished with the beans and had steeped them in their cups. He handed Solenne's to her with a smile. There was no reason to give away what he was thinking. She smiled back.

  "I have some bacon here and this jam is apple that would go well with the bread I have upstairs. I know it is close to being too stale to eat but its all I have." Solenne told him looking down at the counter. He could see a slight flush to her freckled cheeks.

  "There's nothing to worry about Solenne. We've all been there." He lied with surprising ease.

  Emrys had never gone without. He didn't know what a hungry belly felt like. The Aureate Church had always provided for him. Even before he was a scholar, the Light made sure he never knew that sort of pain. "I will go make us something. You sit here and I will return in a few moments." He smiled as he took the food from her. Emrys balanced the bacon, jam, and his coffee mug in his hands before carefully making his way up the stairs.

  The narrative has been taken without authorization; if you see it on Amazon, report the incident.

  He heard the creak of the stool below. At least she had sat like he asked. Emrys sat things down on the small counter next to the stove upstairs. He was glad the window was already opened so he didn't have to fiddle with it. Emrys grabbed a knob on the stove, turned it, and listened. Four clicks produced a flame that he adjusted as he needed it. Unlike her coil downstairs, the stove upstairs ran off of a natural gas they called Larium.

  Emrys grabbed a pan from the hanging rack to his right. He noticed she had only one pan and a single pot. She really lived simply. Even though he was on his own, he had multiple pans and pots back in his flat. They were high quality and cooked his food perfectly when he did cook. These, on the other hand, looked as if they were handed down from someone else. There were marks in the cooking surface as well as along the handle. He wondered how many others had owned these before she had.

  He pushed his glasses up his nose and began to cook. Emrys hummed to himself. The small flat soon smelled like coffee, herbs, and bacon. He cooked the fatty meat to his preference, hoping it was okay for Solenne as well. There had been no discussion of how she liked hers. That sent a jolt of guilt through his chest. He had been so wrapped up in the fact that she had lied and then snapped that he had completely forgotten to ask her. It was too late at this point as well.

  You are a selfish man Emrys Durand. He chastised himself. Emrys groaned.

  "Everything okay?" Solenne called up.

  His entire face felt hot. Had he groaned that loudly? "Yes. Everything is fine. Just almost burnt the bacon." He laughed nervously hoping that would cover well enough.

  "Better be careful up there Emrys. Can't have you burning down my shop." She had a mirth in her tone that made him sigh in relief.

  He finished the bacon. Then he cut a few slices of bread, placed them into the bacon fat left in the pan, and fried one side only. Once it was where he liked it, he took the bread from the pan. Putting the fried side down, he spread some of the apple jam onto the other side before stacking a few pieces of bacon on top. He put a little more apple jam onto the other piece and put it atop the bacon stack to make a sandwich. Emrys repeated this so two sandwiches sat on a single plate.

  The scholar took the sandwiches downstairs. He placed the plate down next to where Solenne was writing in her own journal. Glancing over, he managed to read the word 'ashen' before the journal was closed. No. He had just imagined that. Or she was talking about something else. Emrys kept a soft smile on his face.

  "Eat. You need it. I'll go clean." He nodded towards the plate. As he turned, something grabbed the blue and silver sleeve of his robes. Emrys looked at Solenne. Their eyes met. How easily he found himself lost in the honey sunbursts around her pupils. He was also fond of the earthen brown that sun faded into. It reminded him of looking at a flower from above yet far more ethereal. There was that dry mouth feeling again.

  "Please eat with me." Her voice was soft, almost shy. She looked down.

  Emrys reached forward slowly. His thumb gently pressed against the bottom of her chin, his finger underneath it. He wondered if her heart was pounding too as he used the softest of pressure to lift her chin back up so he could look into her eyes again.

  "As you wish, Solenne."

  The way her face bloomed with color made his heart race quicker. He let go of her before moving to grab the secondary stool she'd gotten for him a few days ago. Emrys perched next to her. Neither of them spoke as they picked up their sandwiches and began to eat. He was trying to figure out why he had touched her like that without her permission while also fighting off the voice in the back of his head telling him she was still hiding things from him. As badly as he wanted to tell himself she wasn't, he knew she was.

  They ate in silence. Emrys couldn't tell if she wanted to break the silence or if he should. This was nearly worse than yesterday when he had spoken to an empty room thinking she was right there. He finished his sandwich and cleared his throat.

  "I uhm... I did bring what I got from the Wilds yesterday. Should we make bundles today?" Emrys was praying to the Choir she said yes. Anything other than this awkward moment still going on between them.

  Solenne looked at him and smiled. "You remembered. We should make some specifically for the Lustration. Let me show you how." She finished her own sandwich before taking the plate back upstairs.

  Emrys moved their stools out of the way. He got his bag from the hook on the wall in the stairwell. By the time Solenne returned, he had spread out everything she had sent him after. He couldn't help the beaming smile that formed when he saw how impressed she was with what he had done. If he had been a dog, his tail would have been wagging so hard it would have created a breeze.

  "This is very impressive, Emrys. You did so well. I'm proud of you." She looked proud as she walked by and patted him on his shoulder.

  Proud. She was proud of him. Emrys wanted to grab her and kiss her for telling him that. Every inch of him felt warm. He felt like he could take on the world now and no one would be able to stop him. "Th-thank you." He stammered out knowing he was glowing from her praise.

  "Let's get everything else we will need." She motioned for him to follow her. Solenne led him around the shop. They gathered the herb hangers and some jars as well. Unlike the hanging bundles, these were going to be small ones kept in leather pouches that were meant to be worn either as a neck or on a belt. They were meant to bring luck to those who wore them while also being functional at the same time.

  Emrys grabbed his notebook as they started. Solenne would lay out a variety of things, he would write them all down, and then fumble with putting them together into a cinched up pouch. He got easily frustrated with things that required a finer motor skill than what he had. Despite being a scholar, his hands were made for either writing or shelving books. They were not made for tying thin strips together in intricate knots that were both decorative and functional.

  Solenne would encourage him to keep trying. As he did, she would slowly put together a bundle with him. Of course hers were perfect from years of practice. He just knew in the time it would take him to make one, she could make four or five depending on what she was putting together. Emrys sighed heavily as he fumbled a knot once again. He sat it down and took a few steps back from the counter. He could feel stupid tears stinging his eyes.

  Solenne let him step back without bothering him. He was grateful she seemed to understand that he needed a moment. His body's need to cry when he got frustrated was something that he was constantly embarrassed about. More than once he had been picked on for being sensitive. Yet it was that sensitivity that made him such a good scholar. It allowed him to understand the ancient texts better than others because they were written with not only words but emotions as well. The Choir, all Seraphs actually, were far from unemotional. They felt deeply according to their writings. Emrys just wished he didn't feel so deeply.

  "You are trying to be perfect." She finally spoke as he returned to standing next to her again.

  Emrys looked at her, eyes narrowing a bit. "Yes. The Ecclesium demands perfection from its scholars." They were ordained to be perfect. The church had long ago decreed that anyone who worked in the Ecclesium had to be perfect. They handled the words of the Choir themselves, archived their teachings, anything less than perfect would taint everything. Therefore everything he did had to be perfect.

  She wore a look of pity on her soft features. Or was it pain? She was smiling but it was sad and didn't spread warmth to her eyes like her smiles usually did. Solenne tied the knot she had been working on. She handed the bag to him. He took it and looked from it to her. "What?" He asked not knowing what she wanted him to do with it.

  "Look at it closer, Emrys." She put her hand under his. Her touching him sent a shock through him that nearly made him pull away. If Solenne noticed, she didn't make it outwardly known. Maybe whatever this feeling was just existed in his head. This was the most attention he had ever gotten from a woman before after all. Her hand pressed his up towards his face so the bag now sat directly in his view.

  Emrys adjusted his spectacles and looked at the pouch. He noticed the small knicks in the leather where her knife had skipped as she cut the small slits for the leather to go through. Using his other hand, he turned the pouch. The knot was... It was imperfect. It wasn't even. How? She had been doing this for years hadn't she? How was it uneven? Why did they not match perfectly? The symmetry was important. Wasn't it?

  He moved his head slightly so he could look at her past the pouch. "It isn't perfect." He almost whispered as they stared at one another.

  Solenne nodded. "Exactly. Yet people will never notice unless they are as close the pouch as you are. They will come in, buy it, and not once realize that my fingers fumbled over each other when tying that damned knot." She made a playfully disgusted face when damning the knot.

  Emrys couldn't help but smile widely and chuckle. "It is a damned knot."

  She grinned. By the Light, that grin was brighter and warmer than the sun on the longest day of the season. Emrys felt this sudden need to bask in it as often as Solenne would grace him with the privilege. He blushed heavily at that thought. He could only watch as her eyes darted to his cheeks before returning to his own. Solenne dropped her hand so he could move the pouch from in front of his face.

  "So stop trying to be perfect and help me finish these. It will be lunch time before you know it and Rolan will be sending people this way once their bellies are full." She grabbed another leather pouch.

  Emrys nodded. The two of them returned to work. This time their conversation flowed easier and for a moment, Emrys forgot that Solenne was hiding things.