I am alone on my side of our dance. My hand keeps contact with his. He dances with his father while I was alone without mine. My right hand maintains grip with his left. He dances with his mother while I dance alone, again without mine. My left hand maintains a grip with his right. Now we dance face to face. No longer alone, I am wedded for a second time.

  “Thank you, Lin.” I murmur as I rest my head on his shoulder. He pats my hand as he leads me away from the ceremony.

  “Anything for you, Cea.”

  -----

  “Cea dear, now that we are family.” Trilaneous starts, “I like to ask if perhaps an easing of tension would be possible.” My father in law, the current king of Tri'nila, asks something difficult of me.

  “Of course, I feel time has begun to heal the wound. Certainly we all agree that we wish to preserve all Elf Tapestries, but perhaps I have gone too far.” I say to be diplomatic, perhaps I could even believe it.

  “Of course, dear.” My mother in law replies.

  The father gives Lin a look. Perhaps hoping bed room diplomacy may cool my rage further. I can't say it is a bad approach. We would head back to Cea'nila after tonight. I look at Lin, maybe in a week.

  -----

  “Are you sure you do not wish for more children, Cea.” He asks, perhaps sensing my pain.

  I shake my head. “I will not be a hypocrite, Lin. I won't place a geas on you and my law requires at least one of us to bear them. My geas never work on me.” Because I am a hypocrite.

  He pulls me into an embrace, “I'm sorry.”

  “I think I'm almost ready to let go.” I murmur.

  He knows it means the end of my life, to release the geas. He tells me there is another way but I know the rage I feel when my geas is removed. He doesn't understand the depth of my hatred.

  -----

  I received a note from the Repository scribes. The name has remained with Arccor. But that is only part of the change. I venture to her quarters.

  “Cea.” Sencea says as I enter the room, she glares at me as much as she can. Her second daughter was with her. She had reached tier two a few months ago as well. She has the same cold look as her mother.

  “Glindinal, do tell me. What was the name of Arc'nila previous king?” I ask my granddaughter.

  She glares at me, “Arccor.” Sencea looks confused at her daughter.

  Excellent, I know it was prudent to keep her from returning till after Arcond, no, Arccor had cycled through a Lark. It was an aggressive geas. To have the new names I give replace the collective memories of the Tapestries that go through the central repository. This could be enough for me. With this I could pass on. Let them be scarred as I am. To remember.

  “Thank you, I will—”

  “Why do the princes have Cor in their name?” Glindinal interrupts me rudely.

  I don't reprimand her. Too shocked to reprimand her. I only had two princes so far.

  “Do you know what my first husband's name was?” I murmur.

  “Lingrtal of Tra'nila, not like we hadn't just been to your wedding, Cea.” She sneers out my name.

  “Glin, even I heard the gossip of Cea being unfaithful to his memory by taking another in the same Lark.” Sencea says boldly, knowing that I would not retaliate. Even if she wishes I would. “Do you at least know of Binjal?”

  She dared to speak his name. Her glare at me is met with my own.

  “No, I don't understand.” My granddaughter says.

  My rage is snuffed out. What have I done?

  -----

  “Love?”

  I lift myself from my table. My careful organization scattered to the floor. I look at the man who has claimed the tatters of my heart.

  “Lin.”

  “Whats wrong?”

  “I…” I trail off, unable to express the rent in my heart. He embraces me.

  “It's alright, Cea. It's alright, tell me?” My hand lets go of the clenched piece of parchment. He reaches between us to pluck it out and read it out loud. “Lost Tapestries have left the memories of those born after their passing. Cea, I don't understand.”

  “My geas…” I pause, “They were only supposed to correct the collective Tapestries of names I have changed. But if there is no name anymore.” My voice hitches, “They're forgotten.”

  He speaks softly, “Then you know what you must do?”

  Unauthorized reproduction: this story has been taken without approval. Report sightings.

  I nod, “I can't forgive any loss of Tapestries. No forgiveness for those who breed with lesser races. I must remain strong and firm.” My head pounds as does my heart. I don't hear the tiny murmur from the man who was wedded to me.

  “Cea…no.”

  -----

  “He means well.”

  Lin pours me a glass of wine. He hands it to me while pouring his own. He speaks of his father. We had met with him where I implored him to take up my cause. To deaf ears were my words met.

  “He lacks the courage to do what is necessary to protect all Tapestries.” I say after taking a sip. I frown. It was off. I look at Lin. “I think the bottle went…” I trail off as I fall. I see his eyes look sad at me. A notification popped up.

  -----

  Poison. He poisoned me. Now he sits across from me. A barrier between us. I need to focus. To keep a watch over myself. To not allow one minute movement to slip my attention. He has the ability to have me compelled. I have no mana and no defense. I need to remember every damn detail to ensure I am not compromised. Or at least to know when I have been.

  “I'm going to have them all released, Cea. When they are, I'll set you free. It will take time. You were thorough. I'm sorry it came to this.”

  I glared at the man who told me he loved my laugh. That he understood my pain. That he too has lost those to a permanent end. To an unraveling. I don't say anything to his pleading eyes.

  -----

  My eyes snap open. Another geas has been removed. They started in their own kingdom first. A few immigrations from my own. Though I suppose they would have seized my lands. I sit up in my cell. Powerless and yet tortured with the knowledge that my great work is being undone as I sit here.

  His footsteps echo down the hall. His cadence seared into my mind by hate. Always with a chair in hand. He sets it down in front of the cell. He has a tired smile.

  “How are you doing today, Cea.” I look at him, he shudders. Afraid of me even after so long. I haven't said a word to him. Do I even have a voice anymore? “I brought a guest.”

  In walked in Sencea. “Hello mother, I should reintroduce myself. I am Senadina. Where is Venessa's Tapestry?”

  My rage, which has always simmered, grows. They had released even her. I suppose it's time to speak.

  “I have fully failed. You can ask me in my next Lark, Sencea, if I remember.” I sneer at her. I then gouged my throat with nails I had sharpened on the stone floor. Daggers truly. Ready to do this nasty work when I gave up hope that Lin would come to his senses. The blood flits to the barrier in the cell and I fall forward.

  “No!” He yells. My blood continues to pool. The barrier comes down, he rushes to me. Pushing life magic into me. My throat heals even as he kneels on my arm. Not risking me attempting to fight him. She steps forward. Good. My blood soaks into her bare feet.

  After ensuring my continued survival, he walks Sencea back out of the cell. The barrier returns. He mistook her slacken face for shock.

  “We will get your love’s Tapestry back, Sen—” His voice hitches as the poisoned dagger meant for me slides into his rib. I knew she had it on her, she always carried one on her since she remembered her first Lark. She may only be tier four but her latest craftsmanship is more than capable of piercing a tier seven. He slumps over, not understanding. He gapes at me before dying. The barrier falls down.

  His sentimentality that prevented him from executing me also wouldn't allow the private cell to lock me in here should he have an accident. He was the only one who could open it. He kept me here as his prisoner for twenty years. Using compels to keep me docile when he needed to clean.

  I walk forward. Sencea gains her wits. She quickly charges me. I slap her down, retrieving the knife. Poison was my undoing. It must never be again. It will be useful to find traitors though.

  “How?” My daughter shudders.

  “Just a bit of soul, I have plenty to spare. Burning ten soul days worth is plenty to sneak a compel into you. In fact.” I burn more. As I said, plenty of spare soul. A secret to my continued survival is my willingness to dance at the edge of non-existence. I grab her face, forcing the geas back into her. She squirms.

  “Say your name, child of mine.”

  She cries even as her face slackens, “Sencea.”

  “Good.” I purr. When she regains her mind, her look of hatred is greater than I ever remembered it. “Sencea, you alone will never forget our son's name. Binjal. In exchange, don't remember mine. Cea.” My eyes met her rage with sadness. It confuses her.

  “Mother…” The hate she had lessened a tiny bit. The knife she made enters her heart. I take her Tapestry for myself. Lin has already fled to this country repository. I will need to seize the throne before they realize that I am free. My daughter's knife will serve me well.

  -----

  This is a daily reminder: You have 416 unallocated stat points

  My hands have my sharp, jagged nails again. My tears fall. Why had I doubled down. Triple down. My failures only spurred me on. I should have just allowed myself to bleed out. Torn my throat when he wasn't watching. I don't understand the hate I felt.

  She wraps her arms around me. We are in the carriage.

  “Granddau—”

  “Don't you dare call me that. You're a witness and she was just a mother of a Tapestry return. Being a first Lark you may not get this yet but Elves don't feel nearly as much for their later parents. Grateful but not familial.”

  “Truly, but I loved you—” She pinches my side, I feel my thirst grow. I raise an eyebrow. “That doesn't actually hurt.”

  “It should.” She barks out bitterly, “You're a witness. So tell me what you witnessed.”

  “The fall of Tri'nila.” She winces at my words. “It started with her capture, the first consort poisoned her. It was after she realized she was removing the memory of lost Tapestries from everyone's Tapestry that had her geas.”

  “I remember, she was broken that day. There was hope before then that she was going to pass on, to release the geas. That ended that day too” Glindinal said slowly.

  “Yes, in the end she reapplied her geas to Sen—.” I almost said the name I gave her. “Senadina.” I quirk my nose.

  “Whats wrong?”

  “I…her memories. They're quite acute. She spent a lot of effort watching herself in case she was being manipulated.”

  “So she was beyond paranoid." She said in a tone that implied I was stating the obvious.

  I roll my eyes, “When she said her name, Cea. Her mouth moved more than the single syllable.”

  “I don't understand.”

  “I think Cea erased her own name.” I said slowly.

  “But she gave you her name.”

  “I can't explain it.” I frown, perhaps the memory is distorted.

  She catches my expression, “Don't doubt yourself. I mean she is an old Elf but it's relative. Elf names try to be unique. My name is way longer than hers and my Tapestry is nearly two thousand years longer. There is no way she could be called Cea being so recent. Why had we not noticed?”

  “She was the oldest Elf currently, anyone with living memory of it is dead and reborn.” I murmur.

  Glindinal shivers. I joined her in her discontent.

  “How many years.”

  “Fifty.”

  She squeezes me a bit harder in the carriage. She looks up. “Doesn't look like fifty.”

  I chuckle, “Captivity tends to make for condensed memory. I've had a few experiences with that.”

  She looks at me crossly. “Thats not something to laugh about. I swear.” I raise my eyebrow. She answers it with a smile, “Still acting like Sara.”

  I return the smile as my soul warms to that. “So Senadina called you Glin.”

  She rolls her eyes, “You keep trying to shorten my name.” She squints at me.

  “Hey, I did it before I started eating Cea, Din.”

  She glares at me as I laugh. “If I can't hurt you then…” She begins to tickle me. My laughter grows. It causes her to smile hearing it.