Chapter 30: Goren: A Glimpse into a Madman's Mind

  “None of this matters…” Goren whispered, reminding himself.

  He rummaged through his inventory and selected Blackberries. He chewed on some, not for the HP - he was full, but to calm his nerves.

  He sighed as he looted the Golden Bow from the adventurer he had just slain. Her name was Yvon Leskins, a level 92 Ranger from Mikaela’s guild. He’s killed her over and over for Dolos-knows-how-many runs now. It wasn’t like he enjoyed it – though he didn’t mind killing anyone anymore since there were no consequences. He just had to…for the loot, of course. This time it took him a lot longer than usual as his thoughts constantly drifted away. He couldn’t stop thinking about Spellsword’s progress. Funny…he couldn’t even remember his actual name.

  Each loop began with the same old weapons and armor he’d originally had before the quest started, before Dolos had chosen him. It was a nuisance. He had already surpassed level 100 – why wasn’t there a skill that allowed him to keep the loot he’d gained from previous runs? Or at the very least, why couldn’t his inventory retain all of the items instead of resetting every time? Just a few items – Key Items, as Dolos and the System referred to them – remained between the runs.

  He assumed Dolos had done this on purpose, just to play with his mind. It was yet another reason to hate the bastard.

  A bastard he was, but Dolos had given him this chance - a chance to level up beyond his cap and do something great. To change his life. To help his family. And even save the world in the process. So, perhaps he wasn’t all that bad.

  “Let’s see,” Goren muttered under his breath as he rummaged through his inventory like he was doing a checklist. “Sword?” He changed his voice to mimic Alfred Jones, the adventurer he’d looted the sword from. “Here!”

  He nodded, moving forward. “Daggers?” He said, attempting to sound like his guild master’s right-hand woman, Evangelina Volker, whom he’d killed earlier to get them. “Here!” his voice came out awkward. He laughed at the bad impression, then immediately facepalmed for laughing at his own jokes.

  Shaking his head, he proceeded. “Bow is here, of course. Oblivion Orb?” He paused as if waiting for an answer. “Oblivion Orb?” he repeated, but again, there was no response.

  “Yup. That’s what’s missing.” He nodded to himself and looked around. “I wasted too much time in this area.”

  The Oblivion Orb was a magical staff used by one of the high-level mages from Lorren’s guild. It was an extremely useful weapon, making farming monsters easy thanks to its unique AOE spells.

  Why not Lorren’s Aegis Staff or Mikaela’s Stinger? He didn’t want to bother fighting those guys. Goren might have been stronger than any adventurer in this dungeon, but that didn’t mean Lorren and Mikaela weren’t worthy foes. He’d already fought them before and won - but it was never easy. And the rewards? Never impressive enough, or lasting, to justify the effort.

  Besides, whenever he killed them and looted their weapons and armor, a horde of high-level monsters would inevitably appear out of nowhere, taking advantage of his exhausted state to overwhelm and kill him. The loop would reset, taking away all the loot he’d earned with blood, sweat, and tears.

  “Curse you, Erebus!” Goren shouted, his voice echoing through the empty chamber. He still couldn’t figure out how the dungeon kept changing and adapting to his every approach. It was becoming too tedious. Laughing at his own jokes was just the least of the mental cracks beginning to show. The constant call backs to some of his most painful and gruesome deaths were the most horrible thing.

  His thoughts drifted to his mother. She was supposed to be discharged from the hospital tomorrow. The healers said her condition had stabilized, and she could now transition to a home care plan. Finally, after five long years of being hospitalized, she would return home.

  All the money Goren had made adventuring over the past five years went toward his mother’s medical bills. The rest? Caring for his little brother, Ben. With his mother ill and their father absent from their lives since forever, Goren had been the man of the house – practically thrown into this role overnight. He shouldered too much responsibility from a very young age.

  Originally, he had hoped this quest would go smoothly. He’d planned to get paid, buy his mother a ‘welcome back’ gift, and head to the hospital tomorrow to bring her home. With so many strong adventurers leading them, it felt like the most logical turn of events for their mission, despite the infamously dangerous dungeon.

  But for Goren, tomorrow never came.

  He was reliving this day for the 96th time. He had grown stronger than he ever could’ve imagined, yet he still seemed so, so far away from clearing this dungeon.

  If only Spellsword wasn’t such a liar…He and his idiotic System that wouldn't let him retain his memories...

  Goren had honestly wanted them to join forces and progress together. He believed that sharing the same fate, they would be able to overcome the dungeon’s constant adaptations. He had no ill intentions toward Spellsword at first, but then he forced his hand. And when Goren found a different use for him, Dolos intervened, stopping him abruptly and redirecting his focus for the time being, promising a face off against Spellsword sometime in the future. Dolos hadn’t been able to explain directly – it was against the unwritten rules or some bullshit like that – but he hinted at an item Goren needed to obtain. Apparently, this item would ensure his fight against Spellsword happened as agreed: a battle where the winner would be rewarded with loads of XP, and the loser would be erased from existence.

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  Throughout all of this, Goren had tried to ease his guilt over killing adventurers by telling himself it didn’t matter, that there were no consequences – everything reset after he died. But deleting someone from existence? That was different. Even in the jobs he took on as a Rogue, he always made sure his clients weren't aiming to abuse the rogue class for their own pure self gain.

  He really didn’t want to erase Spellsword. But it was what their gods had agreed upon. Spellsword and he – mere puppets in their hands. There was no going against their vision. There was no point in defying their will. Everything will play out the way they wanted regardless of the mortals’ struggles, because they were gods, and that's how gods operated.

  “Fuuuuck…” he muttered under his breath. “What would Mom think?”

  He resolved that, when it came to that, he’d make sure Spellsword had a fair sendoff. Erasure from existence was no joke.

  “Will I forget him too?” Goren whispered, wondering how it would work. Then he shook his head. “No, I won’t. I’ll probably be the only one to remember him. Someone has to. That would be the right thing to do.”

  Having decided on this, he wondered what his next steps in the current loop should be. He never trailed off for so long in any of the previous loops.

  “What do I even do now…” he muttered to himself, quickly offering a suggestion. “I could go to the wolves’ lair – it’s not far.” Then he immediately dismissed the idea. “No, don’t do that. The item I need is definitely not there. And those wolves barely give any XP anymore. Waste of time.”

  “Then what do you suggest?” he snapped at himself.

  Another idea popped into his mind. “I could maybe go down that corridor over there and finally take out that Razor Basilisk. It probably won’t give much XP either, but who knows? It might drop something good, like the Mole King did. Perhaps the item I am looking for.”

  He paused. “Why am I talking to myself so much?” He shook his head, answering immediately. “Because you have no friends, Goren. Nobody likes you. You have no one. You’re alone.”

  “That sucks.” He said grimly, nodding to himself. “But it is the truth.” Then he wondered how many years of therapy it would take to undo the damage this time loop had done to his mind.

  “Well, let’s go kill the serpent…” he whispered, heading toward the chamber’s exit. But before he could leave, he was attacked.

  Two Blood Wraiths appeared out of nowhere, flying at him with terrifying speed and growling menacingly. They struck him – but his body dissolved into dark mist, reappearing at the far end of the chamber to create distance.

  Then, without hesitation, Goren drew the Golden Bow – a useful weapon against the wraiths of this dungeon. He aimed upward and activated one of its unique abilities, raining golden arrows down on the wraiths. The arrows passed right through them, seemingly dealing no damage, but they triggered a trap – suddenly turning larger and ensnaring the wraiths, holding them in place.

  Switching to the sword – Convergence – Goren activated its unique ability. He drove it into the ground, channeling his mana into the blade. A pillar of magic erupted from beneath the trapped wraiths, searing them. He pressed the sword even deeper, pouring more mana into the spell until the pillar expanded, obliterating the wraiths into dust.

  But it wasn’t over. Two more Blood Wraiths appeared behind him and attacked immediately.

  He dodged quickly, abandoning Convergence and blinking far away, only to be met with dark lightning projectiles. He evaded those with acrobatic finesse, rummaging through his inventory mid-air to grab something. When he landed, the Blood Wraiths disappeared – or rather turned invisible.

  Goren’s Warding Medallion activated instantly, allowing him to see the apparitions through their veil of invisibility. One of them was right next to him when it came out of its invisibility and growled at Goren, attempting to inflict Fear. But Goren was unfazed – his resistances were already high enough to not be afflicted by most status conditions.

  “Was that supposed to scare me?” he laughed, dropping the item he picked from his inventory – a Holy Fire Bomb. An useful item for battling wraiths and undead.

  The bomb detonated in a radiant explosion, damaging and stunning the Blood Wraith while leaving Goren unharmed. He drew the Golden Bow and shot the stunned monster at point-blank range, reducing it to dust.

  Meanwhile, the remaining wraith continued its approach toward Goren, joined by three more of its kind.

  Goren was bored. He sighed. “I know I said I wanted something new, but this is getting boring again.” He muttered to himself. “Just apply the oil and be done with it already.” He suggested to himself, and replied almost immediately. “You’re right.”

  The wraiths attacked simultaneously, but Goren dissolved into mist once more, reappearing at the opposite end of the chamber. He quickly applied Apparition Oil to the daggers, ensuring every strike would land on the monsters.

  Then, he shot himself forward with terrifying speed, weaving effortlessly through the wraiths’ attacks while landing multiple of his own on the tricky-to-hit enemies. He chipped at their HP quickly, without breaking too much sweat, until they were all dead. Well...deader.

  Finally, he turned his attention to the orchestrator of the attack: a shadowy figure lurking in the corner of the chamber, hiding under the veil of magic. His Warding Medallion had caught a glimpse of it when he was trying to pinpoint the invisible wraiths.

  “C’mon, don’t be shy.” Goren called out. “I know you’re there.”

  It was the first time in those 96 loops, that Goren had encountered this person. Finally, something new. Goren was growing so tired of the monotony.

  “You’re strong.” The figure remarked, still hiding in the shadows. “No wonder he marked you.”

  "Marked?" Goren asked, confused. "What? When? How? By whom?"

  “I’ve said enough.” The figure responded. "Your master's presence in you is strong, and so you shall die an agonizing death for serving him."

  Goren raised an eyebrow. “I have no idea what you're talking about, but step out already if you’re so determined to kill me.”

  When the figure finally stepped forward, Goren couldn’t believe his own eyes when he saw its face. “This can’t be…what are you - ”

  He couldn't even finish his words before unimaginable pain shot through his body.