This tale has been unlawfully lifted from Royal Road; report any instances of this story if found elsewhere.

  “Fuck!!!” (Me)

  I just retired Dammit I’m not dealing with this shit at my age! I walked from the barn to my porch and sat down in my chair, sixty-seven years of never ending killing and I finally retired and now this what the hell? I’m going to sit here and enjoy my retirement I will not be someone’s amusement at this age!

  “It wasn’t a request you ass! If I wanted to be in this damn change I wouldn’t be complaining now would I?!” (Me)

  I was waiting for an answer but nothing came, after a few seconds of waiting I finally gave up and checked what that damn watcher did to me. My skin became smooth and tanned but it still had several scars around them, my clothes hardly fit now thanks to my new muscles bulging out. After seeing the changes I couldn’t help but curse under my breath as I changed into my old clothes that I put up so long ago, as I walked back out I saw the neighbor girl walking up to my porch in her revealing clothes. The girl was a cowboy through and through and she wouldn’t let anyone else tell her any other way; dressed in a tank top and short shorts she had a cowboy hat on covering her blonde hair, she smiled at me as she came closer.

  “Hello handsome, what might you be doing here? Have business with the old man?” (Neighbor Girl)

  “Hello to you too Mary, and I take offense to that. How long have I let you work with my horses? And there you go calling me old when you think I’m not here.” (Me)

  “Eh… Um Sir are you feeling okay?” (Mary)

  “Yes I am no thanks to that damn watcher that changed our world, right after my retirement finally went through I get this shit and to top it all off he turned me into a teen again!” (Me)

  “I think I should call my Ma or get Mr. Frank I’m sure he can help you.” (Mary)

  “Show skill: Ageless, and title: forgotten by time!” (Me)

  “……” (Mary)

  “Ya that will shut you up for a bit, help me take care of the animals I don’t want to have any nasty surprises later.” (Me)

  I walked towards the barn only to have Mary run after me, she kept on asking me questions about my new look but I just blew her off and continued on with my work. After about three hours of work we were finally finished which was actually surprising seeing how it usually takes me about seven to finish all the work around the farm, I guess this new body isn’t as bad as I thought but I’m still pissed about it. I started to walk back towards the house when I saw one of the bulls running away from something only to have several wolves chasing it, the wolves were twice the size as regular wolves and had metallic like fur. I grabbed the pitch fork that was sticking out of the hay pile and threw it at the closest wolf only to have it pinned on the side of the barn.

  The wolves stopped for a moment only to see their kin pinned on the barn but instead of acting like normal wolves they went after the bull ignoring the dying wolf. I walked up to the dying wolf and pulled the pitchfork out letting the wolf fall to the ground, I didn’t forget to put it out of it’s misery before going after the other wolves only to see them having a feast.

  These wolves took down a full grown long horn in twenty seconds and they don’t act like normal wolves, leave it to god to fuck with nature! I charged at the wolves with my handy pitch fork skewering two of the wolves at the same time, the other three ran off with scraps of the bull. I sighed as I walked back with the dead wolves. Mary stood by the barn watching the dead wolf from earlier stunned, when she heard me coming she turned towards me with fear in her eyes.

  “Bishop what are these wolves? And how the hell did you do that?!” (Mary)

  “Language, have you not been paying attention the world changed and god fucked with nature I guess this is the result.” (Me)

  “What are you doing with those wolves?!” (Mary)

  “Oh I’m going to make some wolf stakes if you want some you can stay it won’t take much time.” (Me)

  “No thanks I need to get home and tell Ma.” (Mary)

  “You sure, I can send you home with some if you want.” (Me)

  “I’m sure Bishop!” (Mary)

  Oh I guess she really is scared, well no need forcing the issue. I saw Mary leave before heading back towards the dead wolf only to be interrupted by another set of notifications, you know this is starting to get annoying.