Kai stood rooted in the doorway, his fingers tightening around the worn wood of the frame as he took in the absurd yet unsettling scene before him. Gin—thankfully still fully clothed—lay splayed across the bed like a trussed-up festival pig, his wrists and ankles secured with intricate knots that spoke of professional expertise rather than amateur restraint. The leather straps dug into his skin, forcing his legs apart in a position that was equal parts compromising and undeniably painful, his usual expression replaced by one of humiliated fury.

  Looming over him was a woman whose beauty was as striking as it was dangerous. She wore a flowing robe of deep crimson, the fabric slipping precariously off one shoulder as she traced a finger along Gin's chest with predatory amusement. Her lips curled into a satisfied smile, her dark eyes glinting with mischief.

  Kai's jaw tightened. His opinion of Gin had never been particularly high, but seeing him like this—drunk, bound, and at the mercy of some stranger—plummeted whatever respect he had left into the abyss. Without a word, he turned to leave.

  "Wait!" Gin's voice cracked like a teenager's, high with panic. His bound hands twitched uselessly. "Don't just walk away! Help me!"

  Kai froze. Every instinct screamed to keep walking, to let Gin suffer the consequences of his own stupidity. But something stopped him.

  With a long-suffering exhale, Kai turned back, stepping inside and shutting the door with a deliberate click. The woman's smirk widened, her finger pausing its taunting trail along Gin's chest.

  "What's going on?" he asked flatly.

  The woman straightened slightly, her smile widening. "Oh, nothing too complicated," she purred, her voice dripping with false sweetness. "I'm just about to show Gin here a very good time."

  Kai's expression didn't change. He blinked once, slowly, then reached for the door handle again.

  "Wait! It's not what you think!" Gin thrashed against his restraints, his voice edging into panic.

  Kai shot him a withering look. "Gin, I don’t want to be part of your… adventures."

  "It’s not a sex thing!" Gin snarled. "This woman is crazy! She tied me up while I was sleeping!"

  Kai narrowed his eyes. Gin's frantic struggle wasn't just drunken theatrics—he was genuinely trapped. The realization hit Kai like a bucket of ice water: ordinary leather straps couldn't restrain even a half-conscious cultivator.

  Kai drew his blade from his storage ring and flashed it forward, the tip stopping just shy of the woman's throat. "You're a cultivator," he accused, eyes narrowing. "No mundane binding could hold him."

  The woman didn't so much as flinch. Instead, she stepped forward until the sword's point dimpled the delicate skin above her collarbone, her lips curling into a smirk. Up close, Kai could see the unnatural perfection of her features—flawless jade-white skin, full lips painted crimson, and eyes that gleamed like polished onyx. Only the dark shadows beneath them betrayed any hint of weariness, as if she hadn't slept in weeks.

  "Actually," she purred, tapping a fingernail against his blade, "restraining Gin is child's play. Drunken Master Physiology, remember?" She gestured dismissively at the bound man. "All the resilience of a cultivator, but none of the strength unless he's properly soused. And our friend here..." She leaned in conspiratorially, "...hasn't drunk nearly enough to put up a real fight."

  Stolen content warning: this tale belongs on Royal Road. Report any occurrences elsewhere.

  Kai's sword arm wavered slightly. She wasn't wrong—Gin's unique physique meant he was effectively mortal-weak unless intoxicated.

  "Wait," Kai frowned, "how do you even know about Gin's—"

  The woman moved faster than a striking viper. In one fluid motion, she produced an enormous scroll from her storage ring—its length matching Kai's sword—and swung it like a bat. The weighted ends connected with his blade just as his grip slackened, sending him stumbling backward.

  Before he could recover, she unfurled the scroll with a flick of her wrist. The parchment came alive, its edges whipping through the air like striking serpents. Kai barely had time to curse before the paper coiled around him, wrapping him from shoulders to ankles in a cocoon of enchanted parchment.

  "Crud!" Kai yelled, as he hit the floor with a thud, the qi-infused bindings tightening with every struggle. The more he fought, the more the scroll constricted, its spiritual energy resisting his strength.

  "Oh no, Kai!" Gin called out, full of genuine alarm.

  The woman dusted her hands off, turning back to Gin with a predatory smile. "Now that's handled," she crooned, trailing a finger along his jaw. "Let's try this again. Give me what I want, and I'll be on my way. No harm, no foul."

  Gin's eyes darted between her and the immobilized Kai. "Lady, I don't even know what you're—"

  Before Gin could finish his sentence, a sudden poof of purple smoke erupted above the mysterious woman's head. A small, fluffy white ball dropped onto her perfectly coiffed hair like a snowflake.

  The woman blinked in surprise, reaching up to pluck the intruder from her head. She held it up to her face—and found herself nose-to-nose with Soma, the dream rabbit. The tiny creature blinked up at her with enormous silver eyes, its pink nose twitching adorably.

  "Awww," the woman cooed, momentarily disarmed by the creature's innocent appearance. Her fingers instinctively stroked the rabbit's soft fur. "Aren't you just the sweetest little—"

  Then realization struck.

  "Wait a moment... isn't this a dream rabbit? Oh, no—"

  Her words cut off abruptly as her eyes rolled back. The scroll she'd been holding slipped from her fingers, unfurling across the floor as she collapsed like a marionette with its strings cut. She hit the wooden planks with a solid thud, her expression smoothing into one of serene slumber.

  Kai felt the enchanted parchment around him go slack immediately. With a grunt, he freed himself from weakened bindings and scrambled to his feet, rubbing his sore arms. His gaze darted between the unconscious woman and Soma, who now sat primly beside her latest victim, looking terribly pleased with herself.

  "Soma!" Kai exclaimed, scooping the rabbit into his arms. "I've never been happier to see you!"

  Soma emitted a soft squee of delight, nuzzling against his chest as he scratched behind her ears. For a moment, all was right in the world—until Kai remembered himself.

  "But you're not supposed to be here either!" he scolded, holding her up at arm's length.

  Soma's ears drooped instantly. Her silver eyes grew impossibly wider, shimmering with manufactured tears as she emitted a heart-wrenching whimper. It was the look she'd perfected over years of getting out of trouble—the one that made even the sternest masters cave.

  Kai sighed, his resolve crumbling. "Alright, alright... I'll let it go this time. You did save me." He tucked her back against his shoulder, where she immediately perked up, nuzzling his cheek in victory.

  Then his expression hardened as he addressed the empty air. "Zi! I know you're here! That burst of purple qi that made Soma appear was your doing—you've been hiding Soma with your illusions this whole time!"

  Silence.

  The room remained conspicuously absent of any illusion cat. A faint rustling came from beneath Gin's bed—followed by the unmistakable sound of a tail thumping against wood in protest.

  "Oh, so now you're shy?" Kai stalked toward the bed, kneeling to peer underneath. "After lying to me and—"

  A sudden thwack interrupted him as Gin's boot connected with the bedframe. "Enough about the damn cat!" he bellowed, still bound to the bed. "How about untying me before that crazy women over there wakes up?"

  Kai glanced back at the unconscious woman, then at Soma, who was now happily grooming her paws with an air of supreme satisfaction.

  Right. Priorities.