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Chapter 42: Count: Why the Hell Is Grass Growing on My Head?

  In just a short time, more than a dozen goblins had been drained and reduced to mummified husks.

  “Captain, you’re ruthless! You drained those goblins completely—and so quickly!”

  One bat couldn’t help but remark.

  The red-fanged bat glared at him. “Hurry up and drink. This is boring. Let’s finish and get our three hundred gold coins.”

  She had come expecting to feast on the blood of a Goblin Overlord or something elite.

  Instead, it was just a bunch of Greater Goblins, with barely any high-tiers.

  Under cover of night, death descended in silence.

  No one noticed a thing.

  The entire cave remained eerily quiet.

  Tian was sleeping in his private little chamber, surrounded by Moon, Leah, Cassana, Eveleya, and the others.

  One bat cautiously slipped in. When it saw humans and elves, its eyes lit up with greedy joy.

  It thought, “This place is so remote… a quick sip of human blood shouldn’t be a problem, right?”

  As members of the Adventurer’s Guild, they had signed a strict rule: no drinking human blood.

  Even if they killed someone, they couldn’t feed on them if they wanted to operate legally in the Lionheart Empire.

  That’s why these vampires worked as adventurers—to earn money and buy blood.

  The bat stared at Eveleya’s flawless white neck and couldn’t hold back any longer. “Money’s hard to earn and nothing comes easy. No one will notice if I take a little sip here!”

  Driven by bloodlust,

  it finally sank its fangs in.

  The moment its sharp teeth pierced her soft, delicate skin—

  A burst of holy light exploded!

  It lit up the entire small chamber and jolted Tian and the others awake.

  “Who’s there?!”

  Tian snapped awake, crossbow already raised, ready to fire—but he saw no one.

  Just a tiny black shadow darting out.

  Something felt very, very wrong. He barked, “Stay here! I’ll go check!”

  In the main cave, the bat’s fangs shattered from the holy blast. “Damn! A Saintess? Why is there a holy nun in a goblin cave?!”

  It would sooner believe its ancestors’ graves had been robbed than accept this!

  But that holy light couldn’t be faked.

  “Captain! There’s a holy nun!”

  The bat flew back to the main living area and shouted in panic.

  The Church was the natural enemy of vampires—none dared provoke them.

  The red-fanged bat froze mid-drink. “Are you crazy? Why would a nun be hiding in this cave?”

  “All units on alert!!!”

  A shout suddenly echoed from deep in the cave.

  Every goblin snapped awake, instantly on high alert!

  Tian spotted the swarm of bats and sensed something was wrong. “Bats shouldn’t enter a goblin cave… what’s going on…?”

  While thinking, he noticed some goblins still hadn’t gotten up.

  He looked closer—and finally realized.

  They had been turned into dried corpses!

  “Vampires!”

  The word hit him instantly. He roared, “Light the fires! Seal the exit!”

  Gob Bene and the others sprang into action.

  Torches flared up in the dark cave, roaring flames filling the air!

  The goblins surrounded the red-fanged bat swarm.

  Tian said coldly, “You dare come here to feed? Let’s see what you vampires are made of!”

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  “Captain, what do we do?”

  One bat asked—but there wasn’t a trace of fear in its voice.

  The red-fanged bat spun rapidly, turning into a cloud of black mist. When it landed, it transformed into human form!

  Black light armor, pale skin, long reddish-brown hair flowing elegantly.

  Lilith.

  Lilith’s eyes were icy. “Since we’ve been exposed, let’s just kill them. They’re just goblins.”

  As soon as she spoke, the remaining dozen or so bats also transformed into human shapes.

  And they were all female!

  A woman’s heart is the most ruthless, after all!

  Tian sized her up and immediately pulled up her status panel.

  One look and he was shocked!

  【Lilith: Lv61

  Race: Vampire

  Class: None

  Titles: Countess, Immortal Body, God’s Curse…

  HP: 1900

  Strength: 500

  Defense: 500

  Skills: Blood Siphon, Bloodthirst, Dark Form, Infection…

  Equipment: Fine Light Armor

  Overall: 2800】

  Her overall power was nearly three thousand!

  The other ten or so vampires were close to two thousand each!

  How were they supposed to fight this?

  They’d be wiped out!

  Tian immediately changed his tone. “Ahem… Miss, we can talk this out. No need for violence.”

  “There’s nothing to discuss. Didn’t you just say you wanted to see what we’re capable of? Come on, then.”

  Lilith sneered.

  If they’d been discovered right at the start, they would have fled.

  But now? They were all full of fresh blood—their power had surged. Why would they be afraid?

  Seeing her hostility, Tian tried again. “If we fight, neither side wins. Vampires fear fire, don’t you?”

  Lilith let out a contemptuous laugh and snapped her fingers.

  The dried goblin corpses on the ground suddenly stood up! Their eyes glowed red, fangs extended—they’d all been infected and turned into vampires!

  They surrounded Tian’s group.

  Lilith continued coldly, “So? Will the fire burn us first, or will you die first?”

  “Hallelujah!!!”

  Suddenly a burst of holy light erupted!

  It forced Lilith and the others to hide behind the zombie goblins.

  Tian stood tall, arms spread wide, forming the shape of a cross.

  “My god! A goblin… a goblin pretending to be a cross?!”

  “He just shouted those four words! Holy shit!”

  “Acid radish, don’t eat it! Should we rush him first? This low-tier goblin isn’t simple!”

  The vampires were completely dumbfounded!

  A goblin doing that pose?

  Even Lilith was stunned. She quickly ordered, “Tear him apart!”

  Tian shouted, “Everyone—copy my pose! Now!”

  When every goblin struck the same cross pose, holy light suddenly flooded the entire cave!

  If Church members saw this, they’d probably lose their minds.

  A monster using holy skills against other monsters!

  Both sides were locked in a standoff.

  Neither moved.

  Finally, Tian couldn’t take it anymore. “This is pointless. How about we make a deal?”

  Lilith paused, then said, “Speak.”

  Indeed, the holy light was uncomfortable for them to stay under.

  “What do you want?”

  Tian asked directly.

  Logically, vampires wouldn’t come here just to kill him for no reason.

  Lilith didn’t hide it. “We’re an adventurer team from the human side. Someone posted a bounty, so we came to kill you.”

  “Damn… so I’m on a bounty list? No wonder Bright Town was suddenly full of adventurers!”

  Tian suddenly understood.

  Then he asked, “You vampires… still need to earn money?”

  He really couldn’t wrap his head around it.

  One vampire grumbled, “You think blood just appears? In the Lionheart Empire, you can’t just kill people whenever you want. The Guardian of the Holy Sword, the Holy Church—which one is easy to mess with?”

  “I get it now. How about we cooperate?”

  Tian canceled his pose first, signaling the other goblins to do the same.

  There was no need to fight when cooperation could benefit both sides.

  Lilith considered attacking right then, but held back. “Cooperate how?”

  Tian thought for a moment, a bit embarrassed. “You need blood, right? What if I provide it for you?”

  “Boss, they’re vampires! They need massive amounts of blood every day!”

  Leah ran out, worried.

  Tian ignored her concern.

  Lilith snorted. “There’s nowhere near enough blood here for a long-term supply. You’re ruthless—we’ll just leave.”

  She’d never expected goblins to know exorcism!

  They had no choice but to admit defeat.

  Otherwise they could have wiped everyone out easily.

  “Wait. If I say it’s enough, then it’s enough—and even more than enough.”

  Tian called after them, face serious.

  Lilith and the others looked at him in surprise.

  “In traditional medicine, it’s said that the kidneys govern essence and blood—they’re the most vital organ. To stay healthy, you can’t let the kidneys run dry.”

  The vampires looked at him like innocent kids. “What do you mean?”

  Tian cleared his throat, trying to hide his embarrassment. “That’s exactly what it means. Medical studies have confirmed it.And one type of monster figured this out long ago—succubi.

  Why do you think they drain people nonstop but never kill or rob them?

  Because they get perfect nutrition—who’d bother murdering when you can get fed so well?

  “You know us goblins… we may lack a lot of things, but not that. We can form a long-term partnership. You’ll never run out of blood.”

  Seeing they still looked skeptical, Tian decided to prove it on the spot.

  This was a principle from traditional Chinese medicine—he was confident it would work here too.

  Lilith roughly understood.

  After thinking it over, she realized it might actually work!

  But they had to test it first.

  She reached out without hesitation.

  One of the vampires behind her quickly pulled her back. “Captain, we’re the Count’s wives! Even if he’s sealed away, shouldn’t we wait for him?”

  “Right… this feels like betraying the Count.”

  “If this really works, we can stay safe and wait—no more risking our lives. Don’t you know how many sisters we’ve lost these past few centuries?”

  As captain and Dracula’s official wife, Lilith had responsibilities.

  Without another word, she walked toward Tian.

  It was just fulfilling a need for survival—no deeper relationship.

  It didn’t count as betraying the Count.

  When Lilith drank the “blood”…

  The moment her bloodthirst faded, she exclaimed in excitement, “It actually works as a substitute! Everyone—we don’t have to risk our lives anymore! We just need to cooperate with these goblins!”

  “No way… we should’ve figured this out sooner! Those succubi have been keeping this secret to themselves since ancient times!”

  “This… this is real? Let me try!”

  One vampire couldn’t hold back and tried it.

  One after another, they all tested it.

  Without exception—it worked!

  Their bloodlust vanished, suppressed by the new source.

  By now, Tian was on the verge of collapsing. “Leah… help me… haa… haa…”

  “Boss… you’ve really suffered.”

  Leah said, both laughing and crying.

  At that moment, Lilith turned serious. “Goblin, I accept your offer. So, what do you want?”

  “Simple. Protect this cave if there are intruders. I won’t let you go outside, but it’s dark here all year—you’ll be able to move freely.”

  Tian said solemnly.

  Recruiting these vampires wasn’t just a desperate measure.

  He hadn’t tested the vampire race yet.

  This was a golden opportunity to improve tribe quality and gain massive attributes—he couldn’t miss it.

  Though… it did feel a bit unfair to their “Count.”

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