Okay… so… I’m going to talk about Kiyui now. Because honestly… he is just the sweetest, most amazing, and truly perfect creature that has ever existed. I know that people don’t normally say that after a year or so of living together… they say that most relationships lose their passion and often go stale by that point. The honeymoon period comes to an end and things you previously found endearing start to grate on you, etc. But that has not happened here at all. I feel like our love has grown so much stronger and I spend every day just looking at him with sheer adoration

  He has taken to farm life incredibly well. He works hard to make sure all his jobs are done, he helps out with any additional bits and bobs that are going on, he helps my mum give reading and writing lessons to the kids… he looks after the kids… he absolutely loves the kids… he would die for those kids. He cooks, he cleans, he encourages us to spend family time together, he has taught me loads of games to play with the kids and to top it all off, he is still wonderfully enthusiastic about spending time with just me.

  Now… speaking as a deeply insecure individual with massive issues with regards my self-confidence… I cannot stress enough, how much that last bit means to me. And I am not just talking about the sexual side of things… although that is also going amazingly… I mean, just generally.

  Like… he makes time to just be with me… to sit together… to go on little walks together… to just cuddle up, drink some tea and talk to each other… even just to be together quietly without the conversation… just being together… in the presence of one another. It makes me so genuinely happy to do any of those things with him. Just being around him relaxes me… it makes me feel wanted… cared for… and loved.

  Don’t get me wrong… I’m not saying that I don’t feel cared for and loved by anybody else. My Mum loves me, she always has… and I believe that she always will… she has stood by me through everything and I love her more than I can say. But that is a parental love… it is different. With Kiyui… it is… well… just so very reassuring… to know that somebody wants me for me… not because they took pity on me when I was a child and grew to love me… but because they met me when I was grown up… saw me for what I am and still chose to be with me. I can never thank him enough for that.

  I love to just watch him. I could watch him all day. The way his eyes light up when he’s playing with the kids. The way he smiles… the way he flicks his hair out of his face because for some reason he hates tying it back… the way he still does that silly little bow thing when showing gratitude to people.

  He has started reading a lot recently… mostly romance novels from what I can tell. Every time Keith visits town, he insists on going to the library and these trips seem to have caused this interest to flare. It’s nice to see him sitting so chilled out and just peaceful reading. It’s different to when he is playing his lyre. When he plays that, I can sense the passion that he feels for the music. He’s calm and relaxed… but there is an underlying energy to it. With the reading… he’s just so… sedate… which isn’t usual for him… it’s oddly relaxing to see.

  As for the more adult side of things… well… as I said before… they are going amazingly. His desire for me does not seem to have dwindled… and believe me… I was terrified that it would… I really thought that after the novelty wore off, that the sex would die down and we’d kind of just stop having it. But nope… once the kids are in bed, he is always so excited to get down to such things. Genuinely think he may have some kind of addiction to it… can you be addicted to sex? Is that a thing? Well, if it is… I think he has it.

  Now, once again… I need to say how much I truly appreciate and love him because he has truly been…. so… very… patient with me in this regard. Because… as I am sure you will be aware… I was not good at the sexual antics… like… at all. I barely lasted any time at all… hell… the first time he touched me in a sexual way I exploded so hard that it ended up on my chin… and that was literally within seconds of him touching it. Well… I am pleased to say that my stamina has increased in that regard. I now last long enough for us to actually try different positions and stuff.

  I know that probably doesn’t seem particularly wild to some people. I’m sure Kiyui doesn’t view any of it as particularly wild… after some of the things he did when he was a prostitute, I am confident that he views our antics as incredibly tame. But to me, it is all still amazing, fresh, and new… even after four years he still finds new ways to amaze me.

  For example… recently I discovered that it is possible to suck your own penis? Just to be clear… I am not saying that I can do this. After seeing Kiyui do it, I did try… and it all seems so incredibly possible… right up until the tip is a few centimetres away… then I just can’t bend any further and my back starts to hurt. If I fully extend my tongue, I can just lick the very tip… but that’s of no use to anybody. Kiyui… fucking hell… Kiyui is so flexible that he can literally take the whole thing in… like… to the point where his nose is nuzzling in his testicles. It is beyond impressive.

  I should probably explain why I ended up discovering that Kiyui could do this. Well… basically… I am still acutely aware that most of our sexual escapades involve him servicing me in some way. And I know that he says that he likes it that way and that turning me on turns him on, etc. But I still feel like I should be doing more for him. So, I decided that I wanted to try to give him a blowjob.

  Now, I am rather ashamed to admit this… but I sucked at it… okay, that was probably bad phrasing… I… I was just awful. I did not make him ejaculate by doing it… like… I wasn’t even close… I kept catching my teeth on it and making myself gag. I was just a complete and total failure.

  Kiyui said that it is absolutely fine because he is happy to be the one servicing me… but I still think it isn’t fair for things to always be that way around… and I’m pretty sure he just doesn’t want me to feel bad about my complete lack of skill in that area. Because… you know… there is way more to it than just sucking… and while we are on the subject… who the fuck named it a blowjob? There isn’t any blowing involved… it makes no sense.

  Sorry… getting side tracked. Anyway… I think Kiyui could tell that my confidence was a bit knocked by my complete lack of skill. So, he offered to get Olly and Dolly involved so that we could do a side-by-side tutorial and training session. Now… I know he meant well… and to be fair to him, that is a very logical solution… probably the best way to teach that kind of thing. But I still… absolutely cannot get my head around doing such things with anybody but him. Getting other people involved in the bedroom still terrifies me to no end… so obviously, I turned that offer down.

  Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

  The next thing I know he has flung his legs up over his head and his penis is in his face and he is explaining all these tricks and manoeuvres to me… and showing me how to do them… on himself… in front of me.

  I don’t know how you would react in that situation… but my mind was absolutely not in the right place to calmly admire the technique and take mental notes. I was more erection than man at that point. Which I’m pretty confident Kiyui was aware of, because he gave up on explaining things to me pretty quickly and beckoned me closer to him. He slipped his penis out of his mouth and slipped mine in. He was on the end of the bed so I didn’t even need to bend down or anything. His mouth was at the perfect height.

  His hole was bobbing around in front of my face. His tail was swaying about in the air in front of me… and I do have to say… I find the way that his scrotum is connected all the way back to his anus absolutely adorable… it makes his testicles so wonderfully perky… they bounce and jiggle in the cutest way.

  Now… I may be absolutely awful at blowjobs but I have become quite adept at rimming. And I know for a fact that Kiyui enjoys being rimmed. So, I buried my face in him and started to masturbate him with one of my hands. The whole thing was so incredibly erotic. In that moment I genuinely thought it was the highlight of my life. Nothing before that had ever compared to how absolutely turned on, I was in that moment.

  But oh boy… what happened next… fucking hell. He removed my penis from his mouth a split second before he ejaculated… I could feel his anus pulsing on my tongue… which is a weird sensation. It tightened and loosened in these little spasms. I almost came from that sensation alone. Did you know that there are two sphincters in there? My tongue was well in there when he came and I could feel both of them going wild… like… gods… it was such an unexpected sensation.

  I withdrew my tongue and looked down at what he was doing. He had caught all of his semen in his mouth and was applying it to my absolutely rock-hard erection with his tongue. Within seconds my penis was dripping with his semen.

  Then… he started lowering his feet to the ground. As he did, he lowered his bum right down onto my penis… somehow… with perfect aim… he had lowered himself onto me in one swift gliding movement. As his feet touched the floor, I could feel him pressing against my testicles because I was so deep inside him. Seriously… I cannot stress to you enough, how insanely skilled he is at this kind of stuff… it amazes me on a daily basis.

  After the insane roll thing that he had just pulled off the top half of his body kind of sprung back up… he arched his back until his head was on my shoulder. He rubbed my head with his hand and whispered into my ear “fuck me so hard that I can barely breathe.”

  I’m sure I don’t need to explain what happened after that. Suffice to say… I did not last long… and his ability to breathe was not compromised at any point. But honestly… nothing has topped that experience in my life. It was the most sexually charged thing that has ever happened to me. I genuinely could have died in that moment and I would have been happy about it.

  Incidentally… I tried tasting semen a while ago. Mother of mercy… that stuff is vile… it’s like… horrendous. At first, I thought maybe it was just because I’m a goblin… it would make sense that mine tastes awful. But no… I tried Kiyui’s as well. Granted, Kiyui’s was less salty and a bit sweeter… but still disgusting. I genuinely do not understand why Kiyui likes the stuff so much. He laps the stuff up as if it is some kind of delicious ambrosia.

  Don’t get me wrong… I am in no way saying that I dislike that he does that. In fact, seeing him lap the stuff up turns me on to no end… I have absolutely no idea why… but it does. I just don’t understand why he does it. The taste is bad enough… but the smell when it is literally anywhere near my face… just… urgh. Maybe it’s because I am a goblin and my sense of smell is heightened… maybe he doesn’t notice the smell.

  I think I may have got a bit carried away and ended up side tracked again… my point is that the sex is absolutely amazing, and I apologise for the over-sharing… just thinking about this stuff sends my mind into a spiral. Even after four years… it isn’t going stale… I’m not getting bored of it… he is still so enthusiastic and keen to do it. If anything, it is getting better. I am certainly getting better. Not at blowjobs, granted… but I am definitely getting a better handle on what Kiyui enjoys. And having a stupidly long goblin tongue definitely seems to be a bonus when it comes to that.

  I also have to admire the preparation that he goes into for this stuff. Because when using my tongue back there… not once have I ever come across anything… how to put this… unsavoury. And you would expect to come across… well… some very unsavoury stuff back there. He must wash it out or something. He has all of these peculiar devices and things that he disappears off to the bathroom with after the kids have gone to bed but before coming to our room… maybe they are involved… maybe I should ask him at some point… but I quite like not knowing… for once in my life I think I appreciate the mystery of something instead of being hell bent on finding out the reason why.

  Once again… I find myself getting side tracked… I do apologise… probably went into unnecessary detail there. My point is… the sex is perfect… the time we spend together is perfect… the time that we spend as a family is perfect… he is just perfect and I love him more than I can say.

  The reason why I am so excited... is because… well… I’m thinking about asking him to marry me. You may be thinking that that is a little out of the blue… but it was because of something that Alexi said the other day.

  Alexi refers to Kiyui as Kiyui… which is his name… obviously… I get that. But given that he calls me Father and my mum Grandmother… I was kind of expecting him to call Kiyui something. I know that Tadwick calls him Kitty… and that has just kind of stuck. But Alexi sticks with Kiyui. So, I asked him why. His response was “since you are not married to Kiyui, it would be improper to refer to him with any kind of familial terminology.”

  Before you think it… yes… I know… I wish he wouldn’t speak like that… he’s nine and he speaks like a middle-aged lady’s maid. But what he said did get me thinking… specifically about marriage. If we did get married then we could be an official family. I know that we don’t need a piece of paper to validate our relationship. We love each other and that is enough. But in the eyes of the law, we aren’t anything. Since we changed their names and stuff, the boys are legally mine, but technically not his.

  I want our love to be acknowledged… legally acknowledged. I want the kids to be his, just as much as they are mine. I want us to be complete equals in this family.

  That was a lot of wants wasn’t it… I don’t want to sound demanding… or selfish or anything. I just want there to be no question about our family in the eyes of the law… and the people who obsess over laws.

  The real question is… the thing that I am still struggling with… is asking him. Like… how on earth do I do that? Do I just casually bring it up in conversation… just… plant the seeds and see if they grow? Or do I do the whole big outlandish proposal thing? Kiyui has been reading so many romance novels recently… would he expect a big scene… fancy ring… down on one knee and all that?

  The novels are always so elaborate. I want to scream my love for him from the rooftops… but I am also too neurotic to do that, because you know… what if I piss off the neighbours… what if the roof tiles are loose and I fall… etc. I love him… but I’m cautious. I’m excited… but afraid. I have no idea what direction to go in with this… but I have decided that I am going to do it… I think… I just need to work out how… and when.