After Domingo ruined everything, we didn't see our Mom for a long time. It felt like torture not knowing what had happened to her after she had gotten in trouble with Domingo. I had been preoccupied with Carlos, but I always had a bit of worry about my mother running through my head. There was just nothing I could do about it.

  I would watch all the other kids get called into the visiting room, day after day, but it was like our mom dropped off the face of the earth for us. It was radio silence about our mother. The first thing I heard about her was during that conversation the thugs had; until then, I did not even know if she was alive.

  It was only a short time later that we got to visit our Mom once again. I could almost not recognize her because of the change in her appearance. The makeup she would normally wear was nowhere to be seen. Her eyes looked like they had sunken, and there were dark bags underneath them. The background had changed once again. Behind her was just what looked like a dark room. If I looked closely, it looked a lot like the visiting room that I was in with Carlos.

  Mom no longer had that fake smile on her face. I could see how sad she was just by looking at her expression. The tears in her eyes started to run down her face the moment that she saw us on the screen.

  “Oh my darlings, I am so sorry. I thought I was rescuing you. There was never supposed to be any risk for you. The officers that I was working with assured me that nothing would go wrong and that I would be reunited with you if I just cooperated. I now know I was being selfish, and I was wrong to have dreamed of a different future. Everything that I am is going to be dedicated to keeping you safe from now on.”

  The pain and sorrow in our Mom’s voice was hard to miss. It seemed like she was scared to say the wrong thing, like there was someone watching her while she talked to us. After the conversation I had, where I had heard the Thugs talking about Domingo making her his project, I was worried about her. However, the only thing I could do for her right now was show her I was okay.

  As we talked, I realized that maybe she did not know the same things that the thugs were talking about. If I told her all the things that I remembered from that conversation, maybe she could do something to stop it. I did not want either Carlos or me to die, so if she could help us from where she was, that might be the best solution.

  “Mom, I was hearing some of the thugs here talking about something. They were saying that they did not know why they could not just kill us after what you had done. One of them said Domingo had a ….. Plan.” The screen went black right in the middle of my sentence.

  It was like someone had wanted me to stop telling Mom about what I had heard. I decided I would try to tell her exactly what I had heard as fast as I could next time I talked to her. If I talked fast enough, they could not stop Mom from hearing it.

  The next day after our visit with mom, there was a lot of commotion behind the wall next to my sleeping spot. It sounded like there were power tools being used for something, and the banging of hammers. It sounded like there was some sort of construction being done right next to my sleeping spot. The other ghosts heard it too. It was so loud and unpleasant that we wanted to find a different place to sleep, but the room was full, and there was nowhere to go. It ended up not mattering, because the construction sounds lasted only one night and 2 days.

  It felt like a relief after the constant noise stopped. From that point on, I never heard another thing from my listening spot. I don’t know what they did, but it blocked all the sound from coming through the wall. I could only guess that they had understood that I heard that conversation through the wall and wanted to stop me from learning anymore that they did not want me to know.

  We no longer got to see our mother every week. It was hard for me to keep track of time, but it seemed like weeks, even months, had passed before we could have another visit with her.

  I had held onto the thought that I could help if I just told her everything that I had heard through the wall. I had been practicing how I was going to say it, and also so I could say it all before they disconnected us again. So the moment the screen showed our mom on the other end, I was ready, and I said everything quickly.

  “Mom, Domingo wants to make you his project to get revenge for what you did to him. He wants to show he is a God by killing one of us, then make you want to suck something afterwards.”

  We were still connected after I yelled that out. I was glad I managed to warn her about what was coming. I kept watching her on the screen, waiting to see what she would say. She blinked at me slowly.

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  “Thatsss nice honey, and what elssse have you bean up toooo?” Then she sharted Giggling.

  Something was very wrong with our Mom; she was slurring her words and was laughing at nothing. It looked like she was not even looking at us, and she could barely hold her head up. I did not know what would have caused this, but I knew Domingo was doing something bad to her.

  Carlos barely even spoke to Mom anymore. He would sit there silently, looking angry that he was forced to be here with her and me.

  “Why do you have to make so much stuff up, Jaun? You can’t hear through the wall. Stop pretending you know all the secrets because you can hear voices. No one believes you, and it doesn't matter anyway. I am going to be taken out of here anytime now. I am a better fighter than Boss ever was.”

  Looking at my brother, I was shocked to see he wasn't even looking at the screen. It was as if he didn't care that something was wrong with Mom at all. I just tried to tell Mom that one of us was going to be killed, and she did not seem to understand that at all. Domingo was doing something awful, and I could not do anything to stop it.

  It was like I was alone in this world and everything was out of my control. Everything was too much, and I did not know what to do or say. Maybe I was not supposed to do anything, and just let everything happen. It did not matter what I said, because no one believed me. The emptiness came to embrace me. I could feel the same distance from everything building. It did not matter because I was not actually there.

  I watched on from a distance as I sat there watching my mom, who sat there smiling a vacant smile. I idly thought to myself, I wonder if she is in her own emptiness right now, watching as everything happens around her and feeling like she is too distant to care. I kept thinking that Domingo corrupted everyone I cared about. That he destroyed the world around me. What if my superpower was just him corrupting me first, and I did not know what it felt like to be corrupted?

  The corruption could have started with me becoming a ghost. I was probably not strong enough to fight against it. I remember my naive thoughts when I first arrived at Time Out: I was being put here because I was too good. The idea if the bad men hate good, then they punish the good kids for being good and reward the bad kids for being bad.

  I don’t know if I disagree with that thought now, but I sure don’t think I was the good kid anymore. What is good about slowly disappearing into emptiness, while your older brother needs your love and companionship to fight against the anger at what is happening to you? What is good about retreating into yourself so much from pain that your mother becomes so desperate to rescue you that she risks everything to get you out and loses.

  I found myself back in my spot with the other ghosts just lying on the ground looking up at the gray ceiling. When did the visit with my mother end? I can’t remember how I got here.

  I was falling into the emptiness more and more, and it seemed that on the few visits I had with my Mom, things were changing for her, too.

  Every time we talked to her, she seemed to be less aware of the present. She was shaking one time, then she was sweating the next time we saw her.

  It was not even just her physical characteristics that were changing. She was also saying more and more things that just felt wrong coming out of her mouth.

  “I know now that I was wrong to think I could do anything that Domingo did not want. I was so wrong to think that anyone could outsmart him. He is unbeatable, and I should have learned that earlier.”

  Then the next time we saw her, she would show up on the screen with bruises on her face and would be bleeding from the gums in her teeth and would absently be scratching at her cheek until is stated bleeding.

  “When I look at Domingo, all I can think about is how powerful he is. It is as if he is made of steel, and nothing can touch him. I don’t know how I ever thought I could fight against such a man as him. He gives the best sweets. I love sweets; they make rainbows in my body. Can I have a sweet now?”

  My mom almost never looked at the screen anymore; she always seemed to be looking at someone not visible behind us. I felt these visits were no longer for her, nor for us. They were just for the person watching hidden in the distance.

  The last time we visited our mother, she had a few seconds of clarity, as if she saw my brother and me once again. She reached her arms out to us. There were a lot of sores and bruises all over her once beautiful skin. She looked at us for the first time in a while and smiled.

  “My gorgeous babies, you are growing into such strong boys. I love you so so so much. I just don’t think I can take care of you anymore. I tried my very best, but I wasn’t enough. You are going to have to take care of each other from now on.”

  And with just those few seconds, whatever pulled her back to us was broken away. She turned back to the hidden figure. “Did I do good? Can I have my sweets? You have been making me wait so long.”

  The screen went black for the last time. I turned to Carlos with tears in my eyes. I tried to give him a hug because I needed someone beside me. He pushed me away.

  “Why are you crying for that bitch? She left us, she gave up on us, she was weak. I am not weak like her. I am not weak like you. When they take me out of here, I am going to become even stronger than Domingo?”

  Even as he was shouting at me, I saw a tear in his eye. He did not let it fall, though. He ran out of the visiting room with a roar.

  I sat there for as long as they would let me. I could feel the emptiness closing in, but I wanted to remember this. I wanted to remember my mom saying she loved me.