He was warm. Really warm and comfortable, for the first time since he had awoken on the frogite altar. He must be awake at last, from the most intense dream he had ever had. He kept his eyes closed and snuggled down into the soft fur of his blankets. The soft, musky smelling fur blankets that he had never owned. He peeked out. He was not in his bedroom. This time he was in a stone room. Inside some warm blankets. With someone else warm.

  “Humph. You’re awake?” Emi’s voice was deep and sleepy. Her arm was draped over him; her breasts were soft and warm against his neck. She lifted her leg and dropped it over him. This was a much better way to wake up. No daggers, no impending stabbings. Just the warm embrace of a naked woman that could probably snap him in two.

  “I’m alive.” He rolled onto his back and turned to face her. Amber eyes stared at him through dark black lashes. Her body was so hot, the perfume of her sweat wafted across his face.

  I’ve never been this close to a woman before.

  He was in a Turkish bath of female oni pheromones and it was the most deliriously pleasant experience he had ever had. His face was burning up with heat and embarrassment and desire and romance. Her face was red, because she was an oni.

  “I haven’t said a proper thank you for rescuing us, twice, in the dungeon.”

  “How do PCs say thank you?”

  “All sorts of ways, Dee.” She drew her finger down his forehead, along the tip of his nose and then across his lips. All sorts of feelings went through him. But they were all gathering together in one place in his body.

  “I think. You are very. Lovely.” He was overpowered by her presence, he couldn’t think of anything but the way she danced in battle and the way she held him now.

  She kissed him, hard and warm. It was a kiss that could have pulled him down into another dreamworld, a kiss with the gravity of a black hole. He tasted faint liquorice and something else, an intoxicating spice. She gasped with pleasure, and kissed him again, as if she were tasting his soul.

  “You belong to Yuri, but would you liked to dance with me?” she crooned. She lifted her leg again, and this time he felt the warmth from between her legs. A fire that he would be happy to dive into. Her lips looked a little sharper; her eyes looked a little softer. Is this magic or just what a woman looks like in bed?

  “Uh, buh buh.” His body was on fire with desire, he couldn’t speak. All he could do was surrender. His whole life had led up to this moment. The confusion and frustration were about to disappear. He was ready. He put his hand on her waist, just above her hip. It rested there like a warrior returning to his ancestral homelands, it just felt so right.

  “S-s-s-soft.”

  “You’re not.” She grinned and grabbed his behind with her hands.

  His whole body was alive. He could feel his heart beating in his chest. Maximum blood to the gentleman! Shut up brain. This is really happening. I am your weapon lady, lay me to rest!

  Before the sword could return to the stone, their War Priest interrupted.

  “You’re alive!” Tianna cried. She was in silky night-clothes, gold armour nowhere to be seen. She leapt under the blankets with him and threw her arms around his neck. “You didn’t freeze to death!” She hugged him tight and realised something else. “You’re naked! Again! Why?” The blanket pulled away from him and Emi as Tianna leapt up and stared at him with horror. He clutched at the blanket and crossed his legs, trying to hide himself. His sexy dream scenario had turned into embarrassing nightmare. He should have known.

  He hadn’t realised that Tianna was there too. They were all in a cosy wooden hut, with furs on the floor. Light shone from a stone set in the ceiling. There was no sign of Yuri and Arjelica though.

  “You can have your cloak back now, Tianna.” Emizra nodded her head to where Tianna’s cloak was hanging on the wall.

  “You’re in bed with a naked human, Emi!”

  Emi rested her head on her hand and smiled. “Best place for ‘em.”

  “You know what naked humans are like!”

  “The same as clothed humans, just more fun.” She put her arm round Dee and squeezed him. He melted in her hug like a metal bar being shaped by a blacksmith’s raw hand.

  “You can’t just try to seduce me with your, long naked, human body.” Tianna was so horrified, she could barely look away. She stared at him as her cheeks turned redder and redder.

  “I’m not- I didn’t try to seduce you.”

  You might be reading a stolen copy. Visit Royal Road for the authentic version.

  “And your firm, powerful human buttocks. Like delicious peaches of sexiness. How shameful!” Tianna finally mustered the strength to cover her eyes.

  Dee clambered over Emizra, so he could hide behind her. His erection slipped over her thigh and buttocks, and she let out a gasp of delight that turned into honeyed laughter. “I’m not seducing anyone!” he cried.

  “That’s what they say, before they kneel down and kiss you with their, passionate human passion. No!” Tianna leapt back into her own blanket and pulled it over her. “Put some clothes on!” she cried out.

  “What’s wrong with her?” Dee muttered.

  “She reads too much. We should get dressed. I’m sure the others will be happy to see you awake.” She slowly rubbed her buttocks against his cock, then reached back to slap him hard on the bum. “Get up human. We’ll have to dance another time.”

  Emizra stood up, buck naked. No shame, just fine muscled curves, red skin, and coal black hair like a smudge between her legs. And two small red horns, peeking from her tangled head of hair.

  Huh, she has horns.

  She slipped into a gown that was hanging on the wall. Dark purple with silver stitching. It fell like a cascade of velvet across her curves.

  “Are you getting dressed?” Tianna said, staring at him as if he wanted to walk around naked all day.

  “I don’t have any clothes?”

  “We got some from the dwarves.” She pointed to some britches and a shirt hanging on the wall. They looked a bit small but were probably the best he was going to get for now. He wrapped the fur blanket around himself and grabbed the clothes. He was much less confident about being naked than Emi, clearly.

  “Don’t try anything sexy!” Tianna cried as she backed herself against the wall.

  “That’s not something you have to worry about from me.” Right now, he felt the most awkward he had ever felt. I really thought I was actually going to lose my virginity- to Emizra! It’s not that easy. That’s how I know this isn’t a fantasy dream. What a loser I am.

  He slowly put on the clothes, they almost fit. The trousers were a little short and baggy, but he could fasten the shirt comfortably by tucking it into the trousers. The leather shoes seemed to fit his feet perfectly though. They were very sturdy.

  “Where are Yuri and Arjelica?”

  “Talking to the foreman. They wanted me to watch you. For medical reasons!” Tianna said firmly.

  As he pulled on his shoe, Tianna darted forward and grabbed his hand. She squeezed it, then put her hand on his brow, checking his temperature. “You seem back to normal. For a human. You can’t go into the snow out there, it’s too cold.”

  The door opened, and a dwarf entered, letting in a gust of freezing cold air. Dee caught a glimpse of freezing snow and other buildings before the door closed. The newcomer was short and stocky with a broad smile. He was holding a staff, short and topped with a reddish globe. It gave off heat that made Dee break into a sweat. This was how they travelled between shelters.

  He said something in what Dee guessed was Dwarvish to Emizra, who replied in same. They chattered back and forth for a while. He smiled at them and gestured for them to follow.

  “This is Dama. He’s the dwarf that saved you.”

  Dama smiled at Dee, so broadly it looked like his head might fall off. One of his teeth glinted gold. He looked like he worked hard and drunk hard. If you dropped a brick on his head, it would probably break in two, and then get drunk with him down the pub.

  He gestured for them to follow him, and opened the door.

  He shooed them out quickly as mist rushed in. The heat of the staff’s globe created a ball of warm as he held it out. Chilly air hitting the edge of their warm bubble cascaded down as mist, swirling and condensing on their ankles and feet.

  Outside, they saw they were in the centre of a settlement. Low wooden houses covered in a thin layer of snow, and thick snow on the ground around them.

  In the misty distance dwarves worked, clad in bulky armour that covered them entirely. Dee realised Dama had been wearing that armour when he saved him. Stiff leather masks with dark glass lenses covered their entire face. They walked between tall bushes, which were draped with icicles and peppered with snow. Even in the bulky armour their hands moved with slow precision, reaching to pluck glinting shards of something from the bushes.

  “Ice roses,” Tianna said to Dee. “Local prices less the cost to bring these down from the mountains, reduced spoilage… they’re making a fortune! Bless the Kingfisher for his wisdom!” She looked quite happy.

  Dama pointed to a large house, more of a longhouse, near the centre of the settlement. Its curved wooden roof and walls made it look like an upturned boat. Light glowed from the windows along its side, like yellow insect eyes all along the length of the building. This was their destination. Dama led them there, making sure they stayed within the protective warmth. He paid special attention to Dee, keeping him close.

  The snow around them turned to slush the instant their bubble of heat touched it. They had to wade their way through it.

  They heard music and laughter coming from the longhouse. Drums and something like bagpipes.

  Dama urged them in through the doorway. In the reception hall there were more heat staves, dull and inactive, hanging on the wooden walls. This was a very organised operation. They lived and worked here in the terrible cold. All to grow ice roses.

  There was also a thick strip of fur near the floor. Dama wiped his feet and ankles on it, and they followed his example. He tapped his staff and the heat faded.

  The main hall of the longhouse was low roofed, but not so low that Dee had to crouch. Fat globes lodged in the stone floor gave off heat and soft golden light like sunset. There was a long, low table covered in food and drinks, but no chairs besides it. Jutting boulders draped in fur allowed the dwarves to lounge around. There were alcoves along the wall where dwarves played gambling games, whispered, and laughed or just lay and listened to the music. Many of them were half-naked, enjoying the warmth.

  Near the end of the longhouse there was a band of musicians. They were also half-naked. They pounded drums, and played deep wind instruments that looked like bassoons. If Dee had to name the genre of music, it would have been Dwarf Lounge Jazz, slightly chaotic and random but very chilled.

  By the band was the head of the farm, a stocky dwarf with dark black hair and tightly shaved beard. The foreman. He was lounging against a fur covered rock, a wooden mug of something in his hand. He was wearing little more than underpants and fine gold bands on his forearms. His arms and chest were as furry as the fur over his rock.

  Arjelica was sitting by his side, wearing thin underwear straps that left nothing to the imagination. And Yuri was also there, lounging out by the table as if she wasn’t trying to show off her long legs and curved hips.