Charlemagne’s anger reached new heights as he suddenly felt himself wrenched in a million different directions. His Ember Core flared up, fighting against whatever outside force was attempting to spirit him away from his home, his hens, and his chicks. But his defiant efforts proved about as effective as spitting at the sun, and a few moments later his abduction was complete.

  Reality reasserted itself in a manner not dissimilar to water being poured back into an empty glass. First the rooster felt the cold stone floor beneath his claws. Then he sensed, or at least thought he sensed, innumerable lifeforms all around him. Then his vision returned, revealing that he was in a large, well-lit room. A plush green sofa was to his right, while a pair of matching chairs faced a large desk made of some sort of cross between dark wood and mushroom. A being with too many eyes and with too many other appendages to be a human lounged behind the desk. Charlemagne charged it.

  A dense wall of mana flared to life between the rooster and the strange being. The rooster slammed into it with a crackling thud, sending bolts of what looked like lightning flickering into the floor, walls, and ceiling. The illuminated panels on the ceiling shone brilliantly for a few moments before cutting out completely. Charlemagne had been stopped, but not deterred.

  Ignoring the pain radiating from the top of his head, he pushed his indestructible top hat with as much muscle and mana as he could muster, forcing the sparking energy barrier to constantly defend against his assault. But the wall of energy seemed up to the challenge, as it not only held Charlemagne at bay, but also began to send jolts of raw power into the rooster’s body, causing his muscles to seize and disrupting the flow of his mana. An incredible pressure began to build around his body, bursting his eardrums and making it difficult for the rooster to breathe.

  Zenrage activated.

  With his strength rapidly climbing to new heights, Charlemagne ignored the strange alien being that had begun shouting at him and pushed harder, activating his Afterburner Skill. The force almost shattered his neck, but the plucky bird’s extra bone density saved him long enough for his body to adjust to the extreme force. The temperature within the room spiked rapidly as the superheated mana exhaust combined with the waste heat from the arcing energy currents. In just a few seconds, the rooster’s plumage began glowing a dull red. Blue and yellow mana coated his entire body, helping to protect him from the incredible temperatures. The rooster gritted his nonexistent teeth and pushed harder before remembering something important.

  He didn’t need to beat the strongest part of the barrier: just like the asteroid’s mana shield, this wall undoubtedly had weak spots.

  Then Charlemagne did something that surprised even himself. He activated his monocle. Instantly, he was able to see a spot in the wall that appeared to be significantly weaker than the rest. He deactivated his Afterburner and took a step back.

  The creature behind the desk appeared to be relieved by this and held out four of its appendages in what appeared to be a sign of de-escalation. But the strange being misunderstood the rooster’s intentions.

  Charlemagne re-escalated.

  Once again, he slammed headfirst into the energy wall, targeting the weak spot that his monocle had shown him. And, just like last time, lightning flared throughout the room, throwing stark shadows upon the floor, walls, and ceiling that writhed as if they were in pain. Then a thunderclap rang out, the incredible sound passing through Charlemagne’s body and rattling his bones. And then Charlemagne broke through.

  A strange look passed over what the rooster believed to be the other creature’s face. At least, it was the part of the alien being that Charlemagne was planning to impale with his beak. But, just before Charlemagne reached his goal, he found himself hanging in midair, his momentum completely gone. The young rooster attempted to peck at his foe, but he couldn’t move even a single feather. He was stuck.

  A strange green light flashed through the room. Charlemagne found himself back at his original position. The furniture, which had been completely blown away by the force of his Afterburner Skill, was back in its original position. Everything was neat and tidy again. This enraged him.

  But there was a bit of good news as well. The Squiggles appeared to give Charlemagne a pep talk.

  Even gaining an Achievement, a Skill, and leveling three other Skills was not enough to assuage Charlemagne’s rage. He wanted to go back to his farm, eat some corn, and watch his chicks grow up. Why had he been brought to this place? He began to sprint toward the desk again, ready to kill and devour the being that was responsible for his abduction. But, before he went more than three steps, the air itself seemed to harden around him, and he once again found himself unable to move.

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  The Squiggles appeared unbidden and delivered a new message to the incensed avian.

  The lights went completely out in the room, and the resulting gloom provoked an immediate physiological response inside Charlemagne’s body. Chickens are, by nature, diurnal animals. They cannot see in dim light, and complete darkness causes their pineal glands to increase melatonin, decrease corticosterone, and slow their metabolic rate. It mattered little that, due to his Ember Core, Charlemagne could see as well in pitch darkness as he could in the daytime. The rooster almost immediately entered “night mode”, causing Zenrage to deactivate. Even the feeling of being trapped within the cocoon of hardened air transmuted into something that felt more like swaddling. Moments later, a cool mist suffused the room, sending the rooster into tranquil slumber.

  When Charlemagne awoke, his subconscious had had time to process his abduction. His immediate reaction was to fling himself forward again with murderous intent. Once again, the Squiggles appeared.

  The rooster fell asleep a bit slower this time around, but he was still lulled into unconsciousness.

  It took another two attempts before Charlemagne was calm enough to consider listening to what the creature behind the desk had to say. But his struggles were not entirely in vain, as the mighty fowl developed a new Skill through his struggles.

  It wasn’t much, but it was honest work.

  A slightly subdued but still peeved Charlemagne stood before the strange being behind the desk.

  “Bawk!” he demanded. “Bawwwwwk!! Bawwak!”

  “What was that? I’m having a lot of trouble hearing you,” the being replied.

  “Bawk!!” Charlemagne yelled.

  “Ah, yes, you’re upset about being ripped away from those with whom you share genetic material, emotional bonds, or other ties. Yes, that is common. No, I cannot return you. Yes, you will see them again. Probably. Time passes differently here than on your world. No, there’s no way to tell how much time will pass on your world while you are here. Do you have any other questions or complaints?”

  The rooster took a moment to absorb the information that had just been shared with him.

  “Bawk?”

  “Ah yes,” the other being said, putting several appendages behind its odd-looking head and leaning back in its chair. “Why are you here? I apologize, I usually cover that one from the get go, but since you gave me such a fright, I am completely going off script here. Which is strange, because I am not real. But I digress. Welcome, Competitor, to the Systemic Games! You will compete for the System’s favor against a host of other beings, some from your own reality, others from realities that you can’t even begin to imagine! Of course, there are some ground rules and caveats. Your size has been adjusted to match a particular average, as is customary for these games. You will only be competing against creations composed of baryonic matter that are somewhat similar in composition to yourself. We learned a long time ago that pitting inhabitants of neutron stars against carbon-based life forms was…messy. Ha! Sure was interesting though. Anyways, where was I. Oh yes, there may be others that you know here…I believe that the proper term is ‘Champions’? Yes, there are Champions here that you might know. In fact, I almost forgot. You’ll be competing as part of a Party, so we have brought along your Party members as well. Strange that you never upgraded beyond the initial four member limit, but I am sure you had your reasons…

  Well, what do you want to do first? Do a bit of shopping? See your quarters for the duration of the games? Meet up with your Party members, assuming they want to see you? Oh, you’ll be staying in a dormitory with your Party members anyways, so maybe that’s what you want to see first? But, it’s also clear that you’re a being who is seriously sartorially selective, so maybe you’ll want to check out the shops on the Promenade? Oh, who am I kidding, you look like you’re need to take a load off after all that rage. Tell me you’re ready to head to your quarters, and I’ll send you there right now!”

  The rapid-fire speech made Charlemagne’s forehead ache, or perhaps he was still somewhat concussed from slamming his head into a wall made of pure energy. Regardless, the rooster felt a headache coming on. The strange being behind the desk was even more talkative and less informative than Bridget was. It took the rooster a moment to remember that Bridget was no longer among the living, but, by the time he did, he had more important things to consider.

  “Bawk?” he asked.

  “Yes, of course there is a cafeteria. I didn’t mention it before because I assumed that you would rather get your bearings and then settle in before eating. But, if you’re hungry, I can send you straight there. Or, if it’s delicacies that you’re after, seeing as you are clearly a being of incredible taste, the shops in the Promenade offer high quality comestibles – for a price.”

  “Bawk!” the rooster demanded.

  “Of course, of course you can!” Charlemagne’s interlocutor assured him. “Your Party chat feature should still be working. If not, I can submit a trouble ticket to have one of our customer service specialists contact you. Are you having any problems with it?”

  The rooster attempted to contact the other three members of his Party: Ndiogou the Blind Hunter, Sirius the Red Fang, and Phatagin, the pangolin too lazy to acquire a cool nickname. He had totally forgotten that the latter two had left his Party a while ago, with his permission, of course. Nothing happened.

  “Bawk!” he complained.

  “Maybe you could try turning it off and on again real quick?”

  Charlemagne realized that he had turned off his Party chat months ago and never re-enabled it. He turned it back on.

  Bawk! he cried out.

  Charlemagne! Thank goodness you’re here, Ndiogou sent back. I was worried you’d somehow refuse.

  I didn’t get an option to refuse, Phatagin whined.

  Me neither, barked Sirius. I was in the middle of a good hunt too!

  Bawwk Bawk! Charlemagne ordered before turning the chat back off. He had grown accustomed to not having anyone else’s thoughts in his head and was already annoyed at having to put up with his overly garrulous guide. The rooster was ready to conclude his business with the ridiculous being.

  “Bawk,” he told it.

  “Right away, my dear life form,” said the odd creature behind the desk before pressing a button.

  The rooster once again disappeared, but at least this time he knew where he was going.