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Book 3 Chapter 27

  I focus only on following Cassie. I know I should be keeping an eye out for anyone looking to rob us, but I can’t. There are too many people cramming past us, too many voices slamming into my mind. I could glance away from Cassie for just a moment, and have her forever disappear into the throng of people.

  Just stay close behind her and keep my eyes pinned to the back of her head.

  She constantly glances back to check on me as she leads us through the endless sea, shouldering people out of the way the whole time. I follow her down packed streets, paying attention to our route, but nothing else. The endless footfalls, the street vendors screaming their wares at the top of their lungs, fights in the street, it’s all just sound that blends together and washes over me.

  Cassie finally turns into a building. The once grand windows have been shattered and boarded up, and the inside is nearly deafening. A hundred drunk people are dancing to pounding music or calling for an overworked bartender.

  We step inside, quickly walking across the sticky carpet. A small alcove is built into the back wall with a desk right in front of out of order elevators. A broken sign just above it has the barely legible word ‘reservations’ engraved in it.

  Cassie walks straight up to the man behind the desk. After only a short conversation, Cassie exchanges some of our chips for a key, and heads towards the stairwell. I quickly follow her in.

  The door closing behind us does little to block the noise. Even when we leave the stairwell a few floors up, I can still feel the pounding bass.

  Cassie unlocks a door without a word, and steps inside to a room that is surprisingly clean. A single bed sits along the back wall, barely big enough for one person, and a tiny desk without a chair sits in the corner. It’s not clean by a longshot, scattered trash and broken bottles sit on the floor, but at least the worst of the stains have been cleaned and the paper thin bedding washed somewhat recently.

  I immediately take off my cloak and headwrap, letting the cool air chase away the building heat. Zero watches the cameras, and I didn’t see a single sign that anyone else has access to them when I hacked into Eternity. We should be safe to show ourselves, but even if we’re not, I have to anyway. I can’t survive forever wrapped in cloth.

  Cassie watches me strip, shrugs, and removes her cloak as well.

  “Can you lay down?” Cassie asks with a shaky voice. “It’s my turn.”

  “Sure.” I lay my backpack on the table, and Corax hops out of my arms onto it.

  While I move to lay down, Cassie carefully removes her battery and sets it on the floor next to the bed. She waits for the moment I’m comfortable, and she wastes no time climbing onto the bed, grabbing my shirt and burying her face in it.

  Silent sobs rack her body. I wrap my arms around her, holding her close. I like it when she does this for me, I hope she likes it too.

  “It’s so loud.” She says quietly.

  “I’m sorry.” I squeeze her gently. “I’ll read to try to drown out some of it.”

  She gives a small nod. Cool tears are already beginning to soak through my shirt.

  “I’m so tired.”

  She tries to stay silent as she cries, but an occasional gasp, snort, or shuddering breath sneaks out.

  “You don’t have to be quiet.” I whisper to her. “I’m way louder.”

  Cassie shakes her head, but stops holding herself back so much. She lets her sobs be a little more audible, and each one stabs into my mind, demanding I help her.

  I let tears of my own roll down my face while I hold her tightly.

  “Sorry I don’t have any skin. Please tell me if I’m too hot or cold or anything.”

  Cassie shakes her head and clutches my shirt tighter.

  I hold her for a while, letting her empty her emotions into my shirt. The longer she cries, the harder time she has breathing.

  “You can blow your nose into me, it’s ok.”

  “No.” Her voice doesn’t even sound like her own. The confidence and anger she always carries is gone. “You care about it.”

  “I’m going to be wearing the cloak anyway, I can just keep it in my backpack until we can clean it.” My shirt is already dirty anyway, but I think she’d hate to know that. “I’d rather you be comfortable than for me to have my shirt.”

  “It’s gross.”

  “It’s not? I don’t think I can be grossed out by something like this. I don’t have to worry about bacteria or anything. And my shirt makes the most sense to dirty. We might end up needing the rest of the fabric for bandages or something, and I really don’t want to have to use my shirt for that.”

  After a few silent seconds she grabs the hem of my shirt and blows her nose. It’s ok. She’s not doing any permanent damage to Kara’s gift.

  She immediately buries her face back in my chest, but at least she can breathe now.

  I shift my arm to the top of her head, running my fingers across the fuzzy patches of her hair that still remain. It’s not quite the same as when Ivy runs her hands through mine, but I hope it helps regardless.

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  It’s another few minutes before she runs out of her own tears.

  “Sorry.” She uses the hem of my shirt again to wipe her face. “I’m ok.” She lets out a shuddering breath.

  “Done crying?”

  Cassie nods.

  “Alright. Let me take this off before you get dirty.”

  Cassie lets go of me and shifts backwards long enough for me to peel off my shirt. I use some of the still clean parts to wipe off my skin plates and lay back down, pulling Cassie’s head onto my shoulder.

  Her body goes stiff for just a moment, before relaxing fully into my shoulder. The remnants of her artificial shoulder shifts a little before Cassie realizes it’s gone. Instead, she lifts up her leg and places it across mine.

  “Can you talk?” Cassie’s voice is barely audible. “I don’t want to sleep.”

  “Sure.” What in the world do I even talk about right now? She wants to be distracted, maybe I can get her thoughts onto something happier? “What do you want to do once all this is over?”

  “I want to get wasted and read with you.”

  “I’m guessing another book? I think we’re both sick of the one you had in your backpack.”

  Despite everything, a halfhearted chuckle escapes Cassie’s lips.

  “Maybe a little. Ivy gave me a book once that she said I should read with someone… well, it’s not important. But I think I’d like to read it with you.”

  “I’d love to. What’s it about?”

  “Some sci-fi thing I think. She wouldn’t tell me anything else.”

  “Maybe we can get her to give us a hint on the ride home?”

  A second chuckle comes from Cassie.

  “Yeah, I know,” I say. “She would never.”

  “How do you do this?” Cassie shifts her head to look into my eyes.

  “Do what?”

  “You just… Nevermind, it’s fucking dumb.” She hides her face from me.

  “I’ve said a lot of dumb things. You can say some too.” I say gently.

  “You just...” She takes a deep breath to prepare. “You help make things less shitty.”

  “You help too.” I give her a firm squeeze. “I would have never survived without Corax without you.”

  She lets out a third laugh, this one stronger than the others.

  “You need to get Ivy to teach you how compliments work.”

  “I’m sorry! I didn’t mean it that way! I didn’t think about it!” I didn’t mean to imply I only needed her because Corax wasn’t there! “I wouldn’t have survived without you either!”

  “You’re fine.” She looks back up at me again, staring for a few seconds before quickly looking away. “Fuck.”

  “What’s wrong?”

  “I just almost made a huge fucking mistake.”

  “What was it?” I ask.

  “My stupid brain demanded I kiss you.” She tries to make it sound like a joke, but fails horribly.

  My brain short circuits at her words. Does she want to do that? I mean, of course she does. She just said her brain wants to. Do- do I want that? I shouldn’t, like she said, it’s just her stupid brain. Just laughing along with her is the safe thing to do, but then what are these emotions I’m feeling? Just laugh, it’s that easy.

  “Would it help?” Despite my decision, the words come out on their own, barely above a whisper.

  “What?” Surprise dominates both her voice and face in equal measure.

  I guess it’s too late to back out now.

  “Would kissing help you feel better?”

  “Don’t be dumb.”

  “Oh, alright.” I can’t hide my disappointment. I think that’s pretty definitive proof of what emotions are swirling around my mind.

  “Ugh, well if you’re going to be that disappointed.” Despite her words, her excitement is clear.

  She props herself up on her elbow, her shining emerald eyes locked onto mine.

  “You’re going to have to teach me. Your books didn’t exactly include a step by step manual.” I say.

  “It’s easy. Just stick your lips out and close your eyes.”

  “Ok, I’ll do my best. Sorry I don’t have skin.”

  “Don’t apologize.” She says quickly.

  “Right. I’ll do better to get my skin back.”

  “Shut up.” I pull a fourth laugh out of her. “Just close your eyes.”

  “Alright.” I close my eyes and stick out the metal skin plates that make up my lips. I hope it’s good enough.

  The bed shifts as Cassie moves, only to freeze. I wait as long seconds tick by before the bed shifts again.

  My mind freezes as her lips connect with mine. Thoughts try to form, only to get overwhelmed and destroyed before they complete by yet more thoughts fighting for space. Dozens of cycles happen over eternal seconds before she pulls away.

  Her face is red, even more red than it was after she cried. She quickly looks away from me, once again hiding her face.

  “I’m so fucking dumb.”

  “No! I uh…” My mind is still reeling, I’m having trouble even finishing a sentence. “That helped.”

  “Don’t lie.”

  “I’m not! That was really nice!” My voice comes out far louder than I intended. “I just uh, it was a lot. Different than what I expected, but better.”

  “Really?”

  “You’re the one who says I can’t lie. I’d love to try it again if you want to, my mind kind of shut down the first time.”

  “We can try it one more time.” Cassie mumbles, still hiding her face from me. “Just, close your eyes.”

  “Alright, they’re closed.” I push out my lips again and wait.

  Warmth seeps into me as she places her soft lips on my cold, aluminum ones. Pure glee consumes my mind, and I can’t stop a smile from creeping onto my face, and feel her smile mirroring mine. I squeeze her, and she lets out the cutest sound I’ve ever heard. Just a small, barely audible squeak.

  She worms her arm behind my back and tries to pull me even closer to her. Unfortunately, it’s just not possible to share any more of our heat with each other.

  She breaks off the kiss, only to bury her face in my neck. Her heart is beating so fast I can feel it through her shirt. Huh, her pulse is actually very similar to when I was working on her arm. That’s a weird coincidence.

  “That was so nice.” I reach up once again to run my fingers across the little hair she still has.

  She only gives a small nod in response, her face brushing gently across my skin plates.

  “You should try to get some sleep. Do you want me to read to you?” I ask.

  “No.” She replies. “But Corax might.” Only an instant later she clutches me tighter. “Fuck, Corax is going to live that when you do your meld thing.”

  “No.” Corax’s voice comes out of my backpack. I’m glad he climbed in there to give us some privacy, even if I should have thought to look before doing anything.

  “We have a limited ability to keep select memories to ourselves. I won’t let him live it, and I guarantee he doesn’t want to. I promise.”

  “He better not.”

  Cassie relaxes, still in my arm with a leg resting across my body. I begin to read, and she quickly drifts off to sleep despite the pounding music.

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