I didn’t bother with sleep, but instead immediately took a Stamina Potion. I received an arming notification from the UI expining that one more potion on no sleep or an empty stomach would trigger a Durability check of Extreme difficulty or higher.

  “Noted,” I told the psychic notification, then turned to the dies and smiled. “You two have been phenomenally helpful, and I thank you. Now it’s time for me to go administer this cure.”

  The Guards were in charge of wrangling the God of Footfalls, but as it was a god, you couldn’t just box it up and wait for the cavalry to arrive. It wasn’t good manners to something that essentially governed every aspect of footsteps.

  They had kept it boxed in out in the courtyard of the right side up portion of the castle, for days now. Every single Guard I’d see on hand the first day we’d tracked the thing down was different than the guards now on duty. Which was a testament to the weird imbance we had on our hands. Why only one Healer and at least two dozen guards? That didn’t make any sense to me.

  Then again, they had a job that was far less lethal than mine, so of course there were more. Healers had this bad habit of dying, apparently.

  The courtyard itself was littered with fading rainbow footsteps. This thing had run all over the pce: up walls, into windows, up and around trees, back into the courtyard. The tracks criss-crossed the courtyard more than a few times. I imagined the Guards having a hell of a time and felt a little bad we’d spent so many hours messing up the cure before finally getting it right.

  When I asked for who was in charge, I was pointed in the direction of a man by the name of Binks. He was, thought not quite the same size as Bke, still enormous. Instead of Bke’s tiny head and immacutely done up blonde hair, he had a three day growth of patchy bck beard and looked as though he hadn’t slept or showered. He probably didn’t look too different from me at this point.

  “Binks,” I said. “Thanks for holding down the fort. Looks like you guys haven’t had it easy.”

  He stared at me, until I felt uncomfortable.

  “Is there a problem?” I asked, after a fashion.

  “You’re not going to ask?”

  “What, if your name is Jared Mason? Or if you left your car door open, or if you—”

  “Yeah, that.”

  “Why would I?” I asked innocently. “Those movies are a quarter century old. People don’t hate that character like they used to. They’ve moved on to hating plenty of different Star Wars properties and characters.”

  He nodded curtly but narrowed his eyes at me as though he wasn’t completely satisfied with me not making fun of him.

  He didn’t look as though he or his people had been receiving an unlimited supply of Stamina Potions, which I sympathized with. Then again, he wasn’t trying to guard this thing with one person.

  “We have a shield power that reflects motion and power back on the opponent,” he said. “It’s not super effective against godlike creatures and we’re not comfortable using it, but the potion Rainer was using kept it pretty docile. Kept is the operative word here. It jumps.”

  “Sorry, boss.”

  “Yeah.” He frowned. “We’ve been chasing it around and trying to bring it back to this general area. It can walk on walls.” His people couldn’t. They had to employ Rangers for that kind of work. Luckily it did respond to provocation like any prey animal might, so they were able to corral it back to this area just a while ago.

  “Let’s get this cure administered then,” I said.

  I stepped up beside the phanx of Guards with their shields up and glowing blue. They had formed a circle around the twin dark footsteps in the middle of the courtyard, and the footsteps were pacing restlessly back and forth.

  “I got this,” I told them. “Just close the circle in behind me, okay?”

  “That is a terrible idea, sir,” Binks said.

  Of course I knew it was a bad idea, and so did he and all of his Guards on duty, but that’s just because none of us knew better. I was under the impression, based on the Goddess of the Meadows, that these things were suffering and needed reassurance and a good bedside manner as much as they needed to be force fed a pill or injected with a dose.

  “You don’t happen to have the Administer Cure skill, do you?” I asked. “If you do, I’ll gdly hand this over to you and let you handle the situation with your defense powers.” I knew he didn’t, because I didn’t have the fracking intimidation skill, or any way to resist intimidation.

  He shook his head, his frown threatening to slip off the sides of his face. “I do not.”

  “And you don’t have several Free Tokens based on the success level of your Develop Cure check, correct?”

  “No, no I don’t,” he confirmed.

  We stared at each other as the reality of the situation sank in.

  “One of us is a Healer, and the other one isn’t,” I told him. “Let me do my job, okay?”

  “My job is to Guard,” he protested.

  “Okay,” I said. “Then come in with me.”

  It turned out he didn’t want to do that. “I can go in with you,” he said. “I have bonuses for protecting someone with me. My powers will be extra effective if I’m directly guarding an individual.”

  “I promise,” I told him, “that’s not necessary.”

  Let me do a Likability check, I told the UI.

  Likability check: This check can be reasonably covered by the Administer Cure skill. This check is Difficult. Would you like to spend 2* Tokens for an Automatic success?

  Total Tokens: 3 Likability, 6 Free and 3 Special Circumstance Tokens.

  *Hard At Work: Your Tokens are worth double given you are engaged in your css duties.

  I mentally clicked yes, and I watched the slight widening of Banks’s eyes as he saw what had happened. He could spend 4 Tokens overcome my success and initiate whatever contest came next, but he understood my intention, and decided to keep his own Tokens for another day.

  “Fine,” he growled, “but you were warned. If you die doing this, I’m chasing this thing out of the castle.”

  “You do you, Binks,” I told him.

  So it was with great reluctance that he got another half dozen Guards onto the field to create a bubble behind me, so that when they opened ranks, the thing couldn’t slide through me, run up my body and kill me, and make a break for it. Then and only then did they open the line and let me in.

  I got the distinct impression that I was a gdiator and not just facing down a shadowy pair of animated shoes, but a gigantic killer beast frothing at the mouth for some people meat.

  “Heyyyyy,” I said with as much sympathy and care as I could muster. “It’s all right. I know you’re scared.”

  The footsteps backed away from me, then shuffled around to the side, leaving rainbow tracks everywhere it stepped.

  “I’m not gonna hurt you,” I said, crouching down on the balls of my feet. “These guys been zapping you with shields? Well that’s not me. I don’t have a shield, see?”

  The shoes shuffled around but slower than before. They were still clearly agitated, but not as skittish as before.

  I reached a hand out toward it. “You’re going to be all better,” I promised. “I spent all day yesterday and all night working this bad boy up. While these guys out here were trying to herd you back here so we could finish this off.”

  One of the guards started talking, but somebody shushed him.

  The god jumped in arm and raced around in a circle, directly behind me, before skidding to a stop and running back around.

  “Hey,” I soothed, “it’s all right. I got you. I’m here for you, okay? I’ve got this yummy cure all ready for you.”

  This Likability check I spent Tokens on as well, and because it was covered by Administer Cure, it had the full 10 ranks. Lowering the difficulty did it; I only needed three success points on my Likability of 3 and skill of 7.

  The shivering, terrified and sick god gradually calmed, and approached like a starving dog. I held my hand out in that ‘sniff me’ gesture, keeping my voice nice and soft and reassuring.

  “It’s okay,” I repeated for the fiftieth time. “It’s okay, I’ve got you.”

  The god made the first sound I was aware of it making, a pleading and inquisitive coo.

  “That’s right,” I said. “I’m here. I’ve got a cure. You’re going to be all better.”

  Nobody moved. Nobody spoke. The unending stream of reassurance kept spilling out of my face, while my knees ached and my hips compined.

  “Now,” I told it. “I have medicine in this vial.”

  The shadowy shoes made a questioning sound.

  “That’s right. It’s going to make you all better. No more worrying about these shield guys. No more weird noises. All better.”

  Administer Cure check: This check has fallen under the Likability Attribute due to your approach. This check is Nigh Impossible. Would you like to spend 9* Tokens for an Automatic success?

  Total Tokens: 1 Likability, 6 Free and 3 Special Circumstance Tokens.

  *Hard At Work: Your Tokens are worth double given you are engaged in your css duties.

  I mentally clicked yes, and watched as the creature approached the vial, before sipping at the concoction. The other shadowy shoe hopped over and put its toes to the vial as well. The liquid within, nearly dark enough to seem bck, quickly drained out.

  While they did, I reached out and stroked at it. For just a moment, I felt a shock of divinity course up into my arm, and the god gave a start. This thing was pure power. It had nothing but energy, and I could sense that it was sick. The energy entering me wasn’t right. It wasn’t the pure bliss of mana filling up the reservoir that was my soul.

  It made a terrified sound, then a confused sound, followed by a comforted purr.

  Then it was done.

  A fsh of magic announced that the cure had been administered and the god was back to its normal self. The UI had words to say about the situation, but I wasn’t listening. I had also fallen back on my ass and onto my back, which was spasming with the pure power coursing through me.

  I distantly heard shouts of arm and fear from the circling Guards, but I managed to feebly wave my arm.

  “I’m… okay…” I managed. “I’m okay.”

  I was better than okay. I had the simple satisfaction of knowing, for the first time, that I had been the key to purifying the divinity of an actual god, the manifestation of something that was simple, sure, but something innocent and real and all-encompassing. I y there on the ground heaving great big breaths, and grinning up at the sky. Squinting against the bright sunlight, but grinning all the same.

  Sure I’d gotten plenty of help, and some of that had been x-rated help from Tara, but I’d done it.

  “Back off, boys,” I heard Banks call. “It’s done.”

  A lot of relieved sighs went out, a few cheers, and then a whole lot of future beers. The Guards promised each other they’d link up for beers after some much-needed rest. A handful of them bent and cpped me on the shoulder, muttering about what a crazy plucker I was.

  A huge figure loomed over me suddenly, blocking the sun from my view but appearing like nothing more than a rge humanoid blob.

  Eventually I noted the noseless face of Larelle bending toward me, until she was inches from bumping into me.

  “You saved a god,” she said.

  “I mean you helped a lot with crafting the cure. And so did Tara. We can celebrate together…” My head was suddenly full of mental images of the weirdest threesome imaginable, and I banished the thoughts. I could not presume to know Lanelle’s mind. She was not human. She was like a Nakamamon. Or rather, she was a Nakamamon.

  Still, I kept picturing her on hands and knees with me behind her, a serious amount of hair wrapped around my fist, pulling her and forcing her to arch her back. Meanwhile Tara was beneath her, sucking on what could only be enormous nipples.

  What was I thinking?

  You did a good thing, Christopher Fletcher or Chris, she said into my mind. You have saved us all. I have not seen the gods succumb to this illness. I do not wish to see it so long as I draw breath. I cannot imagine what will become of this world when divinity falls.

  I blinked up at the very female creature, who lifted me into her arms and carried me back into the castle.

  Now you are in need of sleep, and a reward.

  I nestled my head against her expansive bosom and smiled dreamily. Yes, I was absolutely and totally drained. A day and a half we’d spent in the b, getting things wrong and then spending tokens.

  I had probably leveled up. I mean, I had definitely leveled up. I could see the little excmation point over my level, which was now Trainee 10. It had been an incredible amount of experience gained, apparently.

  Just as importantly, the UI wanted to let me know that my actions with the God of Footfalls were worthy of reward as well.

  [God of Footfalls] appreciates your efforts in saving it. You have been gifted [Golightly]. [God of Footfalls] understood compassion and salvation could be found through a gentler way. Although terrified of the angry ones, [God of Footfalls] sees that not all humans are bad ones. [God of Footfalls] has seen your effort and the difficulties you went through in crafting the cure, and has bestowed upon you +1 Durability. You gain 1 Durability token.

  Yes. I couldn’t have been happier with this. These attributes seemed like they didn’t come easily, so each increase was a really huge boon.

  I took a look at Golightly, curious to know what kind of ability it would be. Instead, I found it to be the first ever item.

  Golightly

  Item, Wondrous, Legendary

  The wearer of these shoes feels no weariness when walking, leaves no tracks, and gains 5 ranks in any skills that require the use of feet.

  This item has the following properties: unbreakable, soulbound, returning.

  Unbreakable: This item never takes damage and can never be destroyed except by divine power.

  Soulbound: this item belongs solely to you. You may gift this item to another, but the item may never be taken from you.

  Returning: this item returns to your possession at a thought.

  I sent a silent thanks to the God of Footfalls for these gifts.

  Larelle apparently knew the way to my dorm room. She carried me effortlessly down the halls, ascended the staircases, and then opened the door as though I weighed no more than the clothes on her back.

  Up this close to her, I could see she had smooth skin, and her irises were a dark purple, simir to her hair. The pupils nearly melded with the irises.

  Suddenly, I was being lowered into my bed.

  Rest, she told me telepathically. Your work is done. Rest.

  This is Christopher falling asleep almost immediately.