“My name is Hajime, your destined hero.”
Unbeknownst to Hajime, Caladblock was smiling in a crazed, possessive kind of way. A fragile existence forged as a byproduct of Whalescalibur's creation — twin sisters divided by fate. While her sister basked in praise and premium ad revenue, Caladblock harbored the world’s discarded code, ad-blocking instinct, and emotional trauma.
Without the ability to subscribe, she was shunned by the monetized world and fated to fade into oblivion. Twisted by envy, she began her one-woman crusade to destroy all ads. In her prime, she awakened the cursed ability to materialize a 5-kilometer Adless Zone, where no ad could penetrate. People wept there, finally free of jingles.
Many tried to stop her:
-
Amanonus
-
Suckerlook
-
Winttex
…All failed.
Only after the people of Whalepole collectively watched a 7-day sword-polishing ad compilation (with one-hour breaks for bathroom and hydration), did Whalescalibur gain enough corporate blessing to defeat and seal her sister.
Now, after all that, here stood Hajime — a man who pulled her from the stone not to destroy her…
…but to say:
“Isn’t it obvious? It’s the power of love.”
For the first time, someone had said this to her.
And honestly… it still felt unreal. But she didn’t dislike it.
She took a furtive glance at her sister nearby — Whalescalibur, still sobbing incoherently.
Caladblock giggled, venomously sweet:
“Ara, ara, little sister~ Thank you for delivering my destined partner. Fufufu~”
“THIS IS A NIGHTMARE!!” screamed Whalescalibur.
“FUFUFUFU~,” replied her sister, basking in it.
Hajime was almost enjoying himself… until Caladblock added:
“Hajime… I must warn you. In my current form, I can only block ads for a few seconds at a time… and only within a 5-meter radius.”
His smile froze.
“You’re sure? Tell me there’s a more… permanent solution.”
She leaned closer, blushing slightly, “Of course, Hajime-san. But to awaken my full power, you must find the legendary artifact: THE ADBLOCKER.”
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Whalescalibur snapped out of her sobbing fit:
“NOOO! Don’t be tempted by this evil!! You were summoned to bring balance to the ads, not destroy them!”
Her voice faded into white noise in Hajime’s ears.
“…Gotta get my ears checked after this,” he muttered.
Turning to Caladblock:
“It’s about time I polished you, my dear.”
She flushed red with miasmic sparkles.
“Hajime-san… I’ll permit it. Just this once. Just know ill hate it for the both of us”
A popup appeared in his face:
?? Polish EX – Heroic Tier
?? Ad Duration: 5 Minutes
?? “Is your sword moody? Has her shine dulled? With Polish EX, bring out her TRUE glow!”
?? Call now and get 3 EXP vials free!
?? “Just dial XXX-XX-XXXX!”
Silhouettes of swords appeared on screen.
“Ahhh~ It’s amazing! I feel brand new!”
“This luster… it’s like my first unsheathing!”
One suspiciously similar to Whalescalibur: “A truly heroic product… for the masses!”
Such a damned shill…
Then it got awkward.
A close-up polishing demonstration. Slow. Detailed. Gleaming.
Hajime yawned and side-eyed both swords.
They were blushing.
SUS.
The video ended in a weird high note.
“I… how do I even call that number?” Hajime asked out loud.
Whalescalibur was already whisper-calling through sword telepathy:
“Yap yap... squeal... yap yap yap!”
She turned to him, sparkling:
“WE WON THE PRIZEEEE! LUCKY!!! It’ll be waiting for us back at the castle~!”
This damned sword was horny for polish, what about the dignity she seemed to project?
Either way, Hajime made his way toward Merryad.
She had just finished looting a dungeon chest, standing with such radiant joy…
…you’d think she had just seen a divine vision.
+++
The Cursed Anti-Ad Blade – Sister of Whalescalibur
??? Name: Caladblock
?? Type: Sentient Sword (Legendary / Cursed / Adless Artifact)
?? Nickname: The "Adbreaker" / Ara-Ara-sama
?? Personality: Haughty, possessive, tsundere-leaning anti-capitalist
Durability: ∞ (Unbreakable – forged from pure spite)
Ad Tolerance: 0 (Instant rejection, causes ad corruption)
Block Radius: 5 meters (active), 0.2 meters (passive)
Block Duration: 7 seconds base (can be increased)
Cooldown: Emotionally unstable – cooldown varies
Voice Mode: Ara-Ara, Teasing Onee-san (no mute option)
Ad Null Zone: Creates a temporary field where no advertisements can spawn.
Miasmic Aura: Emits faint passive energy that disables pop-up notifications near wielder.
Whalesister Trauma: Automatically blocks all interactions with Whalescalibur for 3 minutes after arguing.
Blush Response: Blushes intensely when praised, sharpened, or called “pretty.”
Effect: Launches a shockwave that disables nearby digital ad entities.
Visuals: Black flames, corrupted data symbols, scream of tortured marketing executives.
Limitations: Requires emotional validation and 1 compliment.
Trust: 38/100
Tsundere Tension: 85/100
Yandere Potential: 17/100 (warning at 70+)
Jealousy of Whalescalibur: 99/100 (unstable)
Forged in the shadow code of Whalescalibur's monetization protocols, Caladblock was discarded before activation due to lack of monetization potential. Became a mythical figure to free-thinkers, pirates, and ad-haters. Sealed for causing three economic crashes in Adlandia.